Social Media Social?
I was on Facebook again for a brief time and to be honest I often times feel like I go there out of some need to be validated and receive some love. Unfortunately more often than not I go away feeling empty and even at times I go away feeling a bit dark inside. I feel sad for myself and for others about how we have resorted to a social media venue to communicate and at sometimes even insult each other. Admittedly, I h ave likely said some dumb things and later regretted it like the time I commented on someones comment about the royal wedding and how wonderful a memory that was of Dianne to which I stated something like: "I don't get all the worshiping of this royal family stuff when the there are kids in the world starving and women being beaten down by abusive partners. I think that person deleted me as her friend and frankly that was OK with me because we were technically never friends to begin with except on Facebook. The question in my mind is whether Facebook friends are like real friends or if we are simply deluding ourselves?
The other part of the social menu is texting. Now even my not so tech savvy husband is texting and he seems to like it. In the eight years that we have been together he has never even shown an interest in texting and I am seriously worried that he will start texting while he is walking or text on the subway platform. All kidding aside there are times when I literally scream because a friend or one of my daughters is texting me back and forth about a subject that really does not merit that many messages. Of course there is also texters who text while driving. OMG! One of them recently ended his life with his head cut off after running directly under a semi truck in his red corvette. Is all this texting stuff worth it really? You cannot help but to ask yourself that question, even if it's not that profound.
And let's not forget about emailing. People say the boldest things in emails don't they? We get really brave when we write emails. I am likely guilty of that one as well, especially lately because the condo board members of our building are not active and don't even live in the building and one of their tenants parked overnight in my parking space. I can justify my ranting like everyone else but is it really the best way to share your feelings? I recall a friend once advising me not to put anything in writing. It's too late now. We have all written and received some truly stupid things via email not to mention the ones about enlarging our penis (sorry had to share that one). I even received an email from a close family member who literally tore me apart about who I was, where I would go and bordered on threatening me. It was an Oprah "aha" moment for me when I realized just how crazy this whole email social media stuff had become. People saying things that they just cannot ever take back.
So what do we do about this whole social media dilemma for lack of another desciptive word? Do we simply shut down our computers, turn off our cell phones and jump through all the hoops to delete ourselves from Facebook? Do we use the media more responsibly? Do we move somewhere remote where there isn't a tower to ping onto? How do we become more responsible for the way we communicate?
To start I say let's all have a face to face talk and call it FaceLOOK. Let's start to make dates with our real friends and family and share our upsets and joys with the people who really matter and who love us. Let's get real about who our friends really are and take an inventory around how we nurture our real friends. Let's be more involved with our children and enjoy their youth before they get old enough to not want to hang out with us anymore. Pick up that phone and call someone who needs to hear some encouraging words and who might be an elder in your family before you sign into Facebook or emails. Do less of the impersonal ways of communicating and get connected with your loved ones and friends by sending them a beautiful handmade card. Make a date with your husband or wife to go for a walk in the park in the evening. Turn off your phones and your television and shut down your computer for a day.
Making the time to actually connect with others will bring us so much closer to a life that is meaningful and rich with love. Take the time to connect with others in person more often. Do it for yourself and for the ones you love as well as those lovely people who have shown you love. Don't replace communication with Facebook because in the end that's not real communication.
The other part of the social menu is texting. Now even my not so tech savvy husband is texting and he seems to like it. In the eight years that we have been together he has never even shown an interest in texting and I am seriously worried that he will start texting while he is walking or text on the subway platform. All kidding aside there are times when I literally scream because a friend or one of my daughters is texting me back and forth about a subject that really does not merit that many messages. Of course there is also texters who text while driving. OMG! One of them recently ended his life with his head cut off after running directly under a semi truck in his red corvette. Is all this texting stuff worth it really? You cannot help but to ask yourself that question, even if it's not that profound.
And let's not forget about emailing. People say the boldest things in emails don't they? We get really brave when we write emails. I am likely guilty of that one as well, especially lately because the condo board members of our building are not active and don't even live in the building and one of their tenants parked overnight in my parking space. I can justify my ranting like everyone else but is it really the best way to share your feelings? I recall a friend once advising me not to put anything in writing. It's too late now. We have all written and received some truly stupid things via email not to mention the ones about enlarging our penis (sorry had to share that one). I even received an email from a close family member who literally tore me apart about who I was, where I would go and bordered on threatening me. It was an Oprah "aha" moment for me when I realized just how crazy this whole email social media stuff had become. People saying things that they just cannot ever take back.
So what do we do about this whole social media dilemma for lack of another desciptive word? Do we simply shut down our computers, turn off our cell phones and jump through all the hoops to delete ourselves from Facebook? Do we use the media more responsibly? Do we move somewhere remote where there isn't a tower to ping onto? How do we become more responsible for the way we communicate?
To start I say let's all have a face to face talk and call it FaceLOOK. Let's start to make dates with our real friends and family and share our upsets and joys with the people who really matter and who love us. Let's get real about who our friends really are and take an inventory around how we nurture our real friends. Let's be more involved with our children and enjoy their youth before they get old enough to not want to hang out with us anymore. Pick up that phone and call someone who needs to hear some encouraging words and who might be an elder in your family before you sign into Facebook or emails. Do less of the impersonal ways of communicating and get connected with your loved ones and friends by sending them a beautiful handmade card. Make a date with your husband or wife to go for a walk in the park in the evening. Turn off your phones and your television and shut down your computer for a day.
Making the time to actually connect with others will bring us so much closer to a life that is meaningful and rich with love. Take the time to connect with others in person more often. Do it for yourself and for the ones you love as well as those lovely people who have shown you love. Don't replace communication with Facebook because in the end that's not real communication.
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