Being Latinos 2

Today it seems there is this charge inside of me to discuss my culture and what I deem is being threatened and minimized by others and by my own people.  These blogs will explore the intimate feelings that I have in regards to being Latino and my observations.  With that said I would like to continue to explore the notion that we as Latinos have a need to reclaim our culture and know that passing it on to our children is not just important but crucial.  

I think we should marry whom we love and it not be base on race or color yet realistically that much of the time there is a built in issue when we marry outside of our culture.  Although it is not true in every case we Latinos must understand that when we marry into the Caucasian race we must become even more adamant about our children learning Spanish and honoring their roots.  Many times when we marry "whites" we forget the importance of our children learning the customs, history and ways of our people.  I think that we go into these relationships believing that we have somehow won a prize and that now we can forget who we are and adopt a completely assimilated life, one that excludes some of the important aspects of who we are.  Whether due to shame or due to ignorance we allow our spouse to become the main influence in our children's life fearing that intervening will cause issues in the relationship.  Besides why should someone else promote our culture to our children?  Is that really realistic?  Well, the answer to that is yes and no because although our spouse may not be Latino or Latina they surely could promote their child's culture as a Latino and make certain to celebrate their heritage as a child of color.  Yet what happens much of the time is that as Latinos we don't push it and we don't promote it when we should be insisting on it.  

I have often times asked young people if they speak Spanish knowing their are of the origin and too many times they will say: "I wish my parents would have taught me Spanish".  I am saddened by this response because one or both parents failed this young person by not teaching them Spanish.  Like many of the people in my era I named my daughter Taina after the Taino and Taina indians of Puerto Rico.  Growing up my daughter had to correct many people because most, even Latinos, did not know how to pronounce it never mind know the origin.  When I came to Chicago in sixth grade I recall the teacher saying my last name incorrectly and when I corrected her she asked: "Where are you from?"  I said I was Latino and Puerto Rican to which she responded: "What is that?"  The clueless nature of a teacher of all professions baffled even my young self.  I could not believe that she did not know where Puerto Rico was and that she did not have the basic skills to approach this in a way that would be less offensive and more compassionate.  Like many Americans we lack the sensitivity and the knowledge needed to embrace and celebrate others who we may deem diffferent from us.  Yet we cannot blame others for their ignorance when we ourselves don't teach our own children pride in who they are, ignoring the basic importance of our language.  

Being Latino has it's labor attached to it, especially when one is a darker Latino and looks obviously different from the mainstream folks.  Although we have people who are blue eyed and blond we truly tun the spectrum of shades of skin, texture of hair and color of eyes.  As some of you may guess the lighter skinnced Latinos have surely been a part of the discrimination put upon the dark ones.  We are sometimes our own enemies and have bought into the notion that "white is right" and that attractive equals lighter skin, blond hair and blue eyes.  This is truly a problem that we ourselves need to be honest about and address in ways that are intentional and specific.  We have bought into he myths that have been put upon us and the ones we have placed on ourselves.  I will never forget when I was in grammar school in Ohio and my mom came to pick me up at school.  The next day several of my classmates asked me: "Was that your mom?"  I responded with a yes and each and every one of them rebutted with: "but she's white".  In fact my mother is Latina with a lot of Spanish blood and she was very light skinned (really white) with blond hair.  Her mother was very Spaniard as was her grandmother.  She looked like a "white lady" and these children were simply expressing what they knew and the limited perception of Latinos they grew up with.  It wasn't their fault but rather the lack of life skills in their upbringing.  Not understanding that Latinos come in all shades was one of the things I learned early on but moreover I learned that everyone who was light skinned were considered "white".  

To be continued: