Never feel bad for yourself because of what someone else: thinks of you. Don't let what others think steer how you feel about yourself or make you feel less or more valuable. When people say nasty or underhanded things to you it is just a way for them to feel better about themselves, or so they think. People learn early in life that if someone says something bad about them or to them that they need to be worried. That may be true at times but it is usually just someone projected their insecurities and hate about themselves. When others talk about you the best way to deal with that is to walk away and to think to yourself that this person or people are likely struggling with their own self worth. It is not about you, it is about them. Most of us have had people name call us, create an image about us that is false, try to put us down or otherwise be mean spirited.
What we should understand is that their meanness comes from a place of hurt and that someone put them down at one time and they are simply passing that energy to us. We don't have to accept that energy. Is is just bad energy being passed down like a feeling gets felt by one person and then the next. When we sense a bad energy from someone our first step could be to get further away from that energetic draw. We can walk away, we can excuse ourselves and we can not give it power. We have a choice. Then the next step is to go to a place where we can center ourselves. I do this when my partner is in a bad mood or he is saying anything that I may be interpreting as not so kind. Walk right into a room where you can sit or lay on the floor and take a few deep breaths. When you exhale do it in a little stronger manner connotating that you are releasing the bad vibes. Understand that it is not your partner alone who is inside the energy but that you can select whether to participate or walk away.
Since we can't change others it is likely not a good thing to point out that another person is being a this or a that. It is more effective to say: "I don't accept that comment and feels unloving to me" or to simply walk. By saying what you feel you are not just setting boundaries you are also demonstrating that unlike in the past you are not going to sit and listen and stay in the poor energy. You are demonstrating that each and every time someone wants to transfer self loathing or hate that you will not accept it and that is setting boundaries. Life is mostly about setting boundaries with people you interact with at home, at work and in the world.
Take your power back, set the boundary, walk away and don't participate. This is the formula for addressing situations with your partner, daughter, son, mom or dad. Whatever we do and say will not
solve the issue at the point where we are feeling disrespected.
I will never forget the beautiful lady who was about sixty who said to me that her husband rants and rants and she sits and listens and says nothing until he is finished about an hour or so later. I looked up at her and I asked her why she sat through the ranting each time and she responded with: "I don't know" to which I gave her the option to walk away each and every time. She started to cry at the realization that she had a choice and that the next time she would walk away as I suggested. She had at that very moment realized that she could set that boundary and that by staying in the room and listening to him she had been disempowering herself and allowing him to bully her. I was very direct is stating that she was not obligated as his wife to stay in the room while he ranted about everything and blamed her for it. She cried some more and as my husband accuses me, "I make people cry". In reality she became aware of her choices and at the end she said she was considering divorcing him. It was all about a woman who was likely being bullied for years and who may have felt obligated to simply take it. She spent years and years believing that she was obligated as a partner to listen to her man vent and then digest his bad energy. When she was given permission via my dialog with her and spirit intervention she suddenly felt a surge of freedom and hence the emotions. She knew now that she could take her power back, not enduce that energy and walk away. In fact she was considering permanently walking away.
I am not saying we should leave our spouses, dump our friends or dismiss a stranger as when we interact with the energy that is unaligned with our spirit. I am saying that we don't have to own it and that we can see that it comes from them and is not sourced by us. We learn to set our own boundaries and at the same time love or let go.
Here is your homework:
Decide that you will walk away from bad energy every time no matter the source for a month.
Share your feelings with anyone who brings bad energy to you but don't blame and shame them, then walk.
Decide that you don't have to accept bullying of any kind from anyone.
Make a list of four things you can do to make sure that you are normally in a good place emotionally and energetically.
Begin a new paradym that says that no one has permission to abuse you.
Coach E
What we should understand is that their meanness comes from a place of hurt and that someone put them down at one time and they are simply passing that energy to us. We don't have to accept that energy. Is is just bad energy being passed down like a feeling gets felt by one person and then the next. When we sense a bad energy from someone our first step could be to get further away from that energetic draw. We can walk away, we can excuse ourselves and we can not give it power. We have a choice. Then the next step is to go to a place where we can center ourselves. I do this when my partner is in a bad mood or he is saying anything that I may be interpreting as not so kind. Walk right into a room where you can sit or lay on the floor and take a few deep breaths. When you exhale do it in a little stronger manner connotating that you are releasing the bad vibes. Understand that it is not your partner alone who is inside the energy but that you can select whether to participate or walk away.
Since we can't change others it is likely not a good thing to point out that another person is being a this or a that. It is more effective to say: "I don't accept that comment and feels unloving to me" or to simply walk. By saying what you feel you are not just setting boundaries you are also demonstrating that unlike in the past you are not going to sit and listen and stay in the poor energy. You are demonstrating that each and every time someone wants to transfer self loathing or hate that you will not accept it and that is setting boundaries. Life is mostly about setting boundaries with people you interact with at home, at work and in the world.
Take your power back, set the boundary, walk away and don't participate. This is the formula for addressing situations with your partner, daughter, son, mom or dad. Whatever we do and say will not
I will never forget the beautiful lady who was about sixty who said to me that her husband rants and rants and she sits and listens and says nothing until he is finished about an hour or so later. I looked up at her and I asked her why she sat through the ranting each time and she responded with: "I don't know" to which I gave her the option to walk away each and every time. She started to cry at the realization that she had a choice and that the next time she would walk away as I suggested. She had at that very moment realized that she could set that boundary and that by staying in the room and listening to him she had been disempowering herself and allowing him to bully her. I was very direct is stating that she was not obligated as his wife to stay in the room while he ranted about everything and blamed her for it. She cried some more and as my husband accuses me, "I make people cry". In reality she became aware of her choices and at the end she said she was considering divorcing him. It was all about a woman who was likely being bullied for years and who may have felt obligated to simply take it. She spent years and years believing that she was obligated as a partner to listen to her man vent and then digest his bad energy. When she was given permission via my dialog with her and spirit intervention she suddenly felt a surge of freedom and hence the emotions. She knew now that she could take her power back, not enduce that energy and walk away. In fact she was considering permanently walking away.
I am not saying we should leave our spouses, dump our friends or dismiss a stranger as when we interact with the energy that is unaligned with our spirit. I am saying that we don't have to own it and that we can see that it comes from them and is not sourced by us. We learn to set our own boundaries and at the same time love or let go.
Here is your homework:
Decide that you will walk away from bad energy every time no matter the source for a month.
Share your feelings with anyone who brings bad energy to you but don't blame and shame them, then walk.
Decide that you don't have to accept bullying of any kind from anyone.
Make a list of four things you can do to make sure that you are normally in a good place emotionally and energetically.
Begin a new paradym that says that no one has permission to abuse you.
Coach E
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