Five Signs That He's Not The One
I am sure that you have all heard this one: "He's Not That Into You". The thing is that it is very true and many women miss that memo. I think that for some it is about this hope that one day he will be that into you. Yet when a guy demonstrates little interest in a relationship with you, it is best to go with the vibe and understand and accept what is. Ignoring the five signs that a guy is not the one will likely end up in heart break or something that looks and feels bad.
Here are the five signs:
1. He calls you late night to "get together".
2. He does not bring you flowers or any such gesture.
3. He tells you kissing is too intimate.
4. He's not attentive.
5. Everything and everyone comes before you.
1. He calls you late at night for a "date" or "get together" or "hook up".
We all know that getting late night calls that pose as a date are really a "booty call". It is simple and straight forward and when it starts this way after you meet a guy it will likely stay like that. He is not the one if he is more interested in having sex with you than being with you out on a date or dinner party. Men who are invested in a woman invite her to go out for a movie and often times want to enjoy active time with her whether it is going to a concert or walking in the park. If you show up to his invitations in the middle of the night just know that you are being used, unless that is what you want as well in which case OK.
2. He does not bring you flowers or anything that looks like one.
A man who does not bother to bring you a rose or some nice chocolate or a pizza is a man who is not courting you and who does not know how to treat a lady. A gentleman brings flowers and lets you know that you are special in some way with some small gesture. If a man is not trained to do this then you may consider him ineligible for you and move to the next one. A man who is not a romantic man is not going to become romantic because you would like him to be. I say if he does not come with the character and personality you would deem lovely, move on.
3. He says kissing is too intimate but wants to be physical with you.
I love this one. I think the first time I really noticed this was when Julia Roberts said this to her client in pretty woman. She was a call girl in the movie and she let him know that kissing was too intimate. I find this interesting coming from men who are OK with everything else but not that. Although a woman should wait for sex and kissing should be first, men are not made the same way. Understanding that when a man does not want to kiss you that it is a bit of a red flag helps you to know that he is not that interested and that he is likely not the one.
4. He is no where near attentive.
When I say attentive I mean attentive. I mean a man who looks at you in the eyes and hears what you are saying and is able to respond. When a man is not attentive and does not hear you then he is likely not interested in getting to know you. He is there for the ride as they say and if you allow it then just know that it is likely not going anywhere at anytime too soon. Attentiveness is akin to kindness and compassion and if a man is neither then it is best to look elsewhere. A man who asks questions that are geared at getting to know you better is an attentive man. That is the kind of man you want.
5. He picks everything before he chooses you.
Any man who you being a relationship with that picks others before you most of the time is not that kind of man that will be there for you and when you need him show up for you. Men who would rather be at the baseball game or at a party over being with you are not likely interested in you. These men are the ones that do everything they like to do and avoid doing things you would like to do and although there are many men like this, is this really what you want? There will be times when men want to just hang with their buddies and that is great but when that becomes a priority over being with you, especially when the connection is new, that my dear is a red flag and a sign of things to come.
For what is it worth there you have it.
Coach Elliott
Here are the five signs:
1. He calls you late night to "get together".
2. He does not bring you flowers or any such gesture.
3. He tells you kissing is too intimate.
4. He's not attentive.
5. Everything and everyone comes before you.
1. He calls you late at night for a "date" or "get together" or "hook up".
We all know that getting late night calls that pose as a date are really a "booty call". It is simple and straight forward and when it starts this way after you meet a guy it will likely stay like that. He is not the one if he is more interested in having sex with you than being with you out on a date or dinner party. Men who are invested in a woman invite her to go out for a movie and often times want to enjoy active time with her whether it is going to a concert or walking in the park. If you show up to his invitations in the middle of the night just know that you are being used, unless that is what you want as well in which case OK.
2. He does not bring you flowers or anything that looks like one.
A man who does not bother to bring you a rose or some nice chocolate or a pizza is a man who is not courting you and who does not know how to treat a lady. A gentleman brings flowers and lets you know that you are special in some way with some small gesture. If a man is not trained to do this then you may consider him ineligible for you and move to the next one. A man who is not a romantic man is not going to become romantic because you would like him to be. I say if he does not come with the character and personality you would deem lovely, move on.
3. He says kissing is too intimate but wants to be physical with you.
I love this one. I think the first time I really noticed this was when Julia Roberts said this to her client in pretty woman. She was a call girl in the movie and she let him know that kissing was too intimate. I find this interesting coming from men who are OK with everything else but not that. Although a woman should wait for sex and kissing should be first, men are not made the same way. Understanding that when a man does not want to kiss you that it is a bit of a red flag helps you to know that he is not that interested and that he is likely not the one.
4. He is no where near attentive.
When I say attentive I mean attentive. I mean a man who looks at you in the eyes and hears what you are saying and is able to respond. When a man is not attentive and does not hear you then he is likely not interested in getting to know you. He is there for the ride as they say and if you allow it then just know that it is likely not going anywhere at anytime too soon. Attentiveness is akin to kindness and compassion and if a man is neither then it is best to look elsewhere. A man who asks questions that are geared at getting to know you better is an attentive man. That is the kind of man you want.
5. He picks everything before he chooses you.
Any man who you being a relationship with that picks others before you most of the time is not that kind of man that will be there for you and when you need him show up for you. Men who would rather be at the baseball game or at a party over being with you are not likely interested in you. These men are the ones that do everything they like to do and avoid doing things you would like to do and although there are many men like this, is this really what you want? There will be times when men want to just hang with their buddies and that is great but when that becomes a priority over being with you, especially when the connection is new, that my dear is a red flag and a sign of things to come.
For what is it worth there you have it.
Coach Elliott
For real
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