Are You Deserving?

I will never forget when my pastor at UCC decided to hold a book club after service on Sundays.  The book that we read was all about grace and the idea that either some of us deserve grace while others do not.  Almost immediately I was moved by this idea that some people deserve God's grace while others may not because of something they did that was so sinful, like killing another human being.  As we navigated through this book the pastor shared that he believed that every single person deserved God's grace.  At the point in which he shared his belief I was a little stunned and asked myself: "Does a rapist in jail deserve God's grace?"  "Does a child molested deserve God's grace?"  I honestly could not wrap my mind around it at first but the more I read and most of all the more I thought about it I eventually decided that everyone deserves god's grace or no one does.  I understood in that moment and time that if God only picked the perfectly good people like me and my kids then he would not be a completely loving and non-judgmental God.

I am a life coach.  I have a Master's degree in Spiritual Psychology I received in 2008.  I am a dad and a grandfather and a brother.  I am not use which of these things about me qualifies me to talk about such an important subject.  Yet what I know is what I know deep inside.  I agree with my pastor and feel strongly now that everyone deserves the Grace God offers.  I know now that intuitively I knew this to be the truth about life and that my judgements of others had only do do with my own issues and areas in me that needed to be healed.  It makes perfect sense to me that either everyone deserves God's touch or none of us do.  Although my behaviors may be considered more acceptable than someone in jail who committed a crime against a child I am not more important in god's eyes and I don't have the right to judge others.  What qualifies me to say this?  Nothing really or maybe just the fact that I have lived to be 62?  The reality for me is that God's love is not something I get to dole out or gift others with.  I don't have that kind of power but most of all that privilege.

I think that what matters most today is what God's grace is.  God's grace means that when we are in need and feeling stressed he is there to bring us back to a loving space.  God's grace means that no matter how flawed we are that he loves us.  God's grace means that we are accepted just as we are: big, small, rich or poor.  God's grace is for everyone because frankly it makes little sense that it be selective.  I believe that God is graceful and that he loves all of us without judgements.  He may be saddened by our actions but I have grown to understand that God is hurt by our mistreatment of other human beings, our environment or innocent animals.  Yet although he is pained by our mishaps we must know that in the end he is a forgiving God.  I am not saying that I condone the behavior of people who hurt others and do horrific things to others.  I am only saying that the entity most empowered over the world and all of what goes on in it is one who does not judge us based on our merits or our lack of it.

We must always do our best to be our best.  Pleasing God is not about going to heaven or hell but more about pleasing our own inner spirit.  Doing things that honor and respect others, our world and animals is simply what we should do.  It is our divine right to be happy and to share that joy with others yet when another human being violates us we must forgive, as god would, so that we can heal and more on.  We may feel superior to the psychotic person we deem bad but what matters most is how we live our own life in our own home.