Sadness Sucks: Get Rid Of Your Blues
Although it may seem like everyone else is happier than you are the fact is that all of us experience the blues. Today I had a dream about my 7 year old granddaughter and in the dream we were in my car headed to meet her mom and dad at a restaurant. Just when I arrived at the strip mall where it was located she decided to open the door and got out of the car claiming she would walk the rest of the way. That is where the nightmare started because now for some reason I could not find the place, my daughter and son in law or her. As I struggled with the fact that someone could have taken her I became completely undone. Flashes passed through my mind about how her parents would be devastated and I would surely not be able to explain this in a way where I'd not be in deep trouble. Suddenly I woke up feeling a deep sadness. I knew that this dream had shifted my feeling in a way that needed attention: what I call an application of love; which leads me to how to get rid of those feelings of sadness when they attack you so here they go:
1. Fake it until you make it:
This will not work every time but there will be times when you know the sadness is expected or on the other hand it is something you can handle in the meantime. Either way moving on may be a good way to simply see if the feeling will subside. In this way you are not giving the feeling power over you knowing that there may not be anything you can do about it right now and that allowing the feeling to swallow you up is not going to serve you in the moment. These are the times when you can ask yourself: Is this really just me overreacting? If the response is yes then smiling and moving on may be the best thing to do.
2. Feel the feelings:
None of us can make the sadness go away every time by moving through it immediately. Most of the time checking in with yourself plays a huge role in recovering your happiness. Stopping, silencing yourself and feeling the feeling may be all that is needed to understand that this feeling will likely pass and that an action step may be in line. This action may ask you to leave a situation like a job or a person you are living with. Feeling the feelings helps us to acknowledge our feelings and understanding we matter. Becoming silent first will lead you to a place where you will understand that the feelings will not kill you.
3. Ask yourself this question: "What is the worse and best thing that can happen?"
Sometimes this easy question will lead you to a knowing place where you are clear that the worse thing that can happen is not so bad and in fact something you will be able to handle. On the other hand thinking about what the best thing that can happen in this situation will demonstrate to you that there could be something good that will come of it.
4. Reframe the feeling: Look at it from a different viewpoint:
When you reframe you look at the feelings and the source of it with a different viewpoint. It is like when someone finds out that their husband is having an affair and they understand that this is simply one of many issue in the relationship and that the affair will help her finally let go of a relationship that is not healthy. Looking at something as a blessing helps us to understand that not everything that happens to us is for bad but that some things are for our ultimate good. Being able to reframe it helps us to get our joy back.
5. Keep moving:
When we get sedentary we are taking the risk that we will fall back while keeping active will at minimum be helpful and have the possibility of helping lift you up. Doing something enjoyable will often times lift us out of the sadness corner and do us good. Staying in and isolating often times makes our situation worse. At the very least visiting someone we love to serve them will bring us joy.
6. Believe you will be guided through it:
Faith is a wonderful and magical thing. Trusting that we will get through it can be as simple as believing you will. I believe that we are all guided and when we believe we are guided we will be guided. Whether it is God, Goddess, Buddha, Angels, relatives who have died or angels believing we are guided and loved is helpful in retrieving our happiness.
7. Apply love and compassion to the feeling and to yourself:
Ask your self immediately: What can I do to apply love to myself right now. Do what comes up for you even if it is as simple as a warm bath with candles and music. Whatever comes up as love and compassion take action and do just that.
More soon...
Coach Elliott Maximo Collazo
1. Fake it until you make it:
This will not work every time but there will be times when you know the sadness is expected or on the other hand it is something you can handle in the meantime. Either way moving on may be a good way to simply see if the feeling will subside. In this way you are not giving the feeling power over you knowing that there may not be anything you can do about it right now and that allowing the feeling to swallow you up is not going to serve you in the moment. These are the times when you can ask yourself: Is this really just me overreacting? If the response is yes then smiling and moving on may be the best thing to do.
2. Feel the feelings:
None of us can make the sadness go away every time by moving through it immediately. Most of the time checking in with yourself plays a huge role in recovering your happiness. Stopping, silencing yourself and feeling the feeling may be all that is needed to understand that this feeling will likely pass and that an action step may be in line. This action may ask you to leave a situation like a job or a person you are living with. Feeling the feelings helps us to acknowledge our feelings and understanding we matter. Becoming silent first will lead you to a place where you will understand that the feelings will not kill you.
3. Ask yourself this question: "What is the worse and best thing that can happen?"
Sometimes this easy question will lead you to a knowing place where you are clear that the worse thing that can happen is not so bad and in fact something you will be able to handle. On the other hand thinking about what the best thing that can happen in this situation will demonstrate to you that there could be something good that will come of it.
4. Reframe the feeling: Look at it from a different viewpoint:
When you reframe you look at the feelings and the source of it with a different viewpoint. It is like when someone finds out that their husband is having an affair and they understand that this is simply one of many issue in the relationship and that the affair will help her finally let go of a relationship that is not healthy. Looking at something as a blessing helps us to understand that not everything that happens to us is for bad but that some things are for our ultimate good. Being able to reframe it helps us to get our joy back.
5. Keep moving:
When we get sedentary we are taking the risk that we will fall back while keeping active will at minimum be helpful and have the possibility of helping lift you up. Doing something enjoyable will often times lift us out of the sadness corner and do us good. Staying in and isolating often times makes our situation worse. At the very least visiting someone we love to serve them will bring us joy.
6. Believe you will be guided through it:
Faith is a wonderful and magical thing. Trusting that we will get through it can be as simple as believing you will. I believe that we are all guided and when we believe we are guided we will be guided. Whether it is God, Goddess, Buddha, Angels, relatives who have died or angels believing we are guided and loved is helpful in retrieving our happiness.
7. Apply love and compassion to the feeling and to yourself:
Ask your self immediately: What can I do to apply love to myself right now. Do what comes up for you even if it is as simple as a warm bath with candles and music. Whatever comes up as love and compassion take action and do just that.
More soon...
Coach Elliott Maximo Collazo
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