Romance and Tragedy

This evening I have become almost obsessed with Luis Miguel who does romantic songs in Spanish that absolutely are impeccable.  In one "Te Desean" (they desire you) he sings about how much others desire a woman he apparently loves.  He says she knows it because he has noted it and he wishes she only knew that he not only desires her but that he loves her.  The song ends without a result and we don't know if he ends up with her.  That is the kind of romantic but rather tragic message of a lot of his songs.  It is about how much love hurts.  It is about how much love ends up being wrong or someone leaving someone.  In another song he says "if you forget me I promise I will forget you", of course in Spanish is sounds ever more intense.  It is more like "if you dare forget me I will dare to forget you as well".  It turns out that the romance is under the frequent circumstance of them both having someone else.  In another verse he says that the love is so strong that we must let it go.  As if to say that it would overwhelm them both.

Romance can be tragic that is true.  We fall in love under the wrong circumstances and we hold on for all the wrong reasons.  We know it's a mistake but we keep it going for as long as possible.  We know we have lost the connection but we keep trying to make it happen.  We realize that there is so little in common between us but we continue to hope that someway somehow it will mend.  We can fix it or so we think.  If we dare like in a Luis Miguel song, we can go off into the sunset riding the white horse with the girl grasping onto us and her long dress flowing behind the horse.  We just know we can make it work.

When love ends it is painful.  We let go but we are still emotionally tied to the person.  We may even walk away but that person seems to be right there next to us and in our head.  As romantic singers often sing "I longed and desired you way before I had you".  We fantasize about the dance and in our dreams we waltz and we kiss with such passion, but then it ends.  Nothing seems to be forever.  And so it is with love and relationship.  We would like it to be forever because the ending is so painful and
hard to do.  We hope that it will last forever so that we never have to feel so hurt and so our heart will not need mending.

There is another sweet romantic song "Noche de Ronda" that is sung by this same artist.  I remember dating someone and asking him to pick up the CD with this song.  He listened to it in his car and admitted to me that it made him cry because he recalled his father listening to songs like this one.  It had been since childhood that he had heard any songs that reminded him of his father who was no longer with him.  Songs can do that to us.  In this song it asks "where are you going, who are you with".  "Tell her that I love her and to come back to me, that roaming about is not good".  He means to say that this woman left him that he loved so much he feels he will dye waiting for her to return.  There is a tragic part to these lyrics but then there is the fact that he seems so loyal to her and loves her so much even though she was roaming in the night, maybe with other men.  Still he could not forget her and let her go.  We fall in love like that at times where it is not only urgent it seems like nothing else and no one else will ever matter.  We soon find out that we can get through it and live on.

Romance and Tragedy.  What a combo!  It is like being in love and being crazy all at once.  It is like we don't want to see the truth about what is really happening and as a result we cannot let go.  We must learn to let go in love because the truth is that over half of the relationships end and the fact is that you cannot hold on to something or someone who does not love you or who is not a healthy match.  Someone who is not there for you or someone who has checked out.  It may be true that romance and tragedy seem to go together but we can mend from such tragedies every time and we do all the time.

I have.