If Only...
In life one cannot help but to ask the question that begins with the words: "if only". Among the most common are:
If only I had a bigger home.
If only my health was not so bad.
If only I had the right outfit for the event.
If only my teeth were whiter.
If only I could lose fifteen pounds.
The list goes on and on and I am sure that you all get it. This kind of thinking comes from a place of lack versus a place of abundance. Instead of looking at the gifts in our life we tend to sometimes look at what we don't have, thinking that if we did, our life would be so much better and we would be much happier. Nothing can be further from the truth when we are so focused on what is lacking in our world. As we think of the state of life we will make more of that in our life. When we come from that I don't have enough and I am not good enough we create an energy that follows us wherever we go.
Commercials and ads are all about making us believe that something is missing, we need something to be joyful again or we are simply not good enough, something is lacking. Our bodies are too big, our teeth are not white enough, our hair is not quite the right color and our bra is ill fitting. We are bombarded with messages that something is wrong with us and that no matter how much we have there is more and we must strive to get it, whatever that is. The commercial industry has made millions by making us believe that we need that particularly useful item for the kitchen for one good reason, we don't have one. Every day that we watch TV we get the same message of lacking and needing something we likely do not need, something someone wants to sell us. There are no limits as to what kind of product as long as the message gets across to enough of he gullable population that to begin with has some self-esteem issues that will drive them to over extend themselves and even get into debt to satisfy a feeling of lack.
Ronda has been in a place of lacking for many years because she would like to be in a relationship but has been unable to lose the twenty five pounds she feels she needs to lose in order to begin dating or consider it. She has tried everything or so she says to everyone who will listen. Still she has not been able to lose the weight and hence she continues to be single and alone. Ronda is a pretty woman who is a size 14. She has many assets including beautiful skin and a pretty face. Yet for her that is not enough. Ronda lives in a place of lacking and a man could seek her out and she would simply not notice or reject it because when we are in a place of "not enough" and "not good enough yet" we repel all that may come to us, particularly a love interest. Ronda may never be in a loving relationship because even if she loses the twenty five pounds it is really not about the weight, it is more about her self-image and a belief that she is not ever quite there yet.
We have a hundred reasons why we feel as though we are good enough most of which come from the old messages we grew up with about lack. Even in school we learn that we are competing with others and that life is about being better than and that once we are better than we will succeed, when in fact it is not at all about being better than but about understanding that we will never be perfect or perfectly ready. We will come to realize that what we have and who we are is good enough and that our physical form is beautiful as it is. Once we embrace those truths we can embrace and appreciate anything and everything of who we are in the moment, only changing if that change is part of an overall quest to become a better person and not just to impress others.
These are the questions I would ask:
If only I could embrace who I am and love that person fully.
If only I could connect with others in an authentic and compassionate manner.
If only I could enjoy every moment of my life and appreciate that I am breathing.
If only I could understand that thoughts of lack is a lack of gratitude.
If only I could live my life fully with what I already have in the place and time I am in now.
If only I had a bigger home.
If only my health was not so bad.
If only I had the right outfit for the event.
If only my teeth were whiter.
If only I could lose fifteen pounds.
The list goes on and on and I am sure that you all get it. This kind of thinking comes from a place of lack versus a place of abundance. Instead of looking at the gifts in our life we tend to sometimes look at what we don't have, thinking that if we did, our life would be so much better and we would be much happier. Nothing can be further from the truth when we are so focused on what is lacking in our world. As we think of the state of life we will make more of that in our life. When we come from that I don't have enough and I am not good enough we create an energy that follows us wherever we go.
Commercials and ads are all about making us believe that something is missing, we need something to be joyful again or we are simply not good enough, something is lacking. Our bodies are too big, our teeth are not white enough, our hair is not quite the right color and our bra is ill fitting. We are bombarded with messages that something is wrong with us and that no matter how much we have there is more and we must strive to get it, whatever that is. The commercial industry has made millions by making us believe that we need that particularly useful item for the kitchen for one good reason, we don't have one. Every day that we watch TV we get the same message of lacking and needing something we likely do not need, something someone wants to sell us. There are no limits as to what kind of product as long as the message gets across to enough of he gullable population that to begin with has some self-esteem issues that will drive them to over extend themselves and even get into debt to satisfy a feeling of lack.
Ronda has been in a place of lacking for many years because she would like to be in a relationship but has been unable to lose the twenty five pounds she feels she needs to lose in order to begin dating or consider it. She has tried everything or so she says to everyone who will listen. Still she has not been able to lose the weight and hence she continues to be single and alone. Ronda is a pretty woman who is a size 14. She has many assets including beautiful skin and a pretty face. Yet for her that is not enough. Ronda lives in a place of lacking and a man could seek her out and she would simply not notice or reject it because when we are in a place of "not enough" and "not good enough yet" we repel all that may come to us, particularly a love interest. Ronda may never be in a loving relationship because even if she loses the twenty five pounds it is really not about the weight, it is more about her self-image and a belief that she is not ever quite there yet.
We have a hundred reasons why we feel as though we are good enough most of which come from the old messages we grew up with about lack. Even in school we learn that we are competing with others and that life is about being better than and that once we are better than we will succeed, when in fact it is not at all about being better than but about understanding that we will never be perfect or perfectly ready. We will come to realize that what we have and who we are is good enough and that our physical form is beautiful as it is. Once we embrace those truths we can embrace and appreciate anything and everything of who we are in the moment, only changing if that change is part of an overall quest to become a better person and not just to impress others.
These are the questions I would ask:
If only I could embrace who I am and love that person fully.
If only I could connect with others in an authentic and compassionate manner.
If only I could enjoy every moment of my life and appreciate that I am breathing.
If only I could understand that thoughts of lack is a lack of gratitude.
If only I could live my life fully with what I already have in the place and time I am in now.
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