How to Control Anger
It seems that the one thing I have learned is that life is a journey and that the journey is life long, as long as we are alive. We never stop learning nor do we ever stop having the journey. The good news is that when we work at our life and do the work we need to do, we can manage everything with ease, even in those times when we fall to our knees. There are reasons why we feel sad, happy, resentful, fearful or angry. For me anger has been the emotion of choice, much like marijuana is a drug of choice for others who would rather conceal their feelings, escape or simply feel relief (and there is nothing wrong with this if it works for you). Anger seems to me to be a feeling that we can easily experience daily because in some way or another something or someone will "piss us off" as people say. This is a raw feeling and there are so many reasons to be angry that they seem endless. We become angry because: someone says something inappropriate or unkind to us, we lose our job or relationship, our children are doing poorly in school, someone is bullying us or we are inexplicably angry and don't know why exactly. The best news is that we can manage and overcome anger by practicing some simple actions in our life:
1. Prayer Prevention:
We can intercept anger by praying daily and making it a practice. For some prayer is a bad word so I would suggest that you meditate or take some silent time each day where you are still, either seated or laying down. When you meditate or pray put the palms of your hands upward as if to receive. Picture your guide, God, Buddha or Goddess providing you with inner peace. You may like to repeat a mantra like: "I am centered, happy and whole". You can and will prevent anger by having a practice of prayer every day.
2. Personal Perception:
The manner with which we perceive things that happen to us will certainly dictate how we react to it and how we overcome it. We must look at the people who anger us and understand that they are human and that it may be their only way to feel alive or whole. We must not perceive everything people do as a personal affront to us but rather their illness manifesting in our life. Don Miguel Ruiz who is a spiritual healer and life coach would suggest that we "never take things personally". Although it is difficult to do this all the time, it is in our highest good to follow this advise. Don't take anything personally because if you do you will be angry all the time.
3. Push the Past:
Stop living in the past. Living in the past and thinking about those bad situations will only make you upset and hence you will stay angry. Push the past out and do everything you can not to bring the past up or discuss it with others or with yourself. Get yourself together, brush yourself off and live in the moment. There is nothing you can do about your past and the only thing you can change if anything is the future. By focusing on the now you automatically let go of the past.
4. Breath in Your Butterfly:
Like a butterfly we too can transform and when we focus on transforming we are becoming a butterfly. A butterfly is likely one of the most beautiful of creations and so are you. In addition to seeing your inner butterfly there are things you can do to calm yourself down using breathing techniques. Take a deep breath in through your mouth (counting to ten), hold it (count to four), exhale slowly and completely (until you feel it in your abdomen). The issue with many of us is that when we become upset our breathing becomes short and often times we can end up hyper ventilating. Learning various breathing exercises will help us to breath through the anger and it the same time picture our transformation, into a beautiful butterfly.
Here are the best four suggestions to put anger out much like how a fire is put out. Getting anger out is as urgent as putting out a fire and we must understand that holding it in is extremely toxic. We cannot expect to stay angry and that the person we are angry at will die from that poisoners thought. In fact we are the ones who will die from the poison and for holding on to that kind of toxic energy. Find out what it is that is making you angry and forgive that person, that situation or that past circumstance. Live your life doing things that feed peace and bring forward what you really want in your life. "May the Force Be With You".
Love and Light, Elliott Maximo Collazo
1. Prayer Prevention:
We can intercept anger by praying daily and making it a practice. For some prayer is a bad word so I would suggest that you meditate or take some silent time each day where you are still, either seated or laying down. When you meditate or pray put the palms of your hands upward as if to receive. Picture your guide, God, Buddha or Goddess providing you with inner peace. You may like to repeat a mantra like: "I am centered, happy and whole". You can and will prevent anger by having a practice of prayer every day.
2. Personal Perception:
The manner with which we perceive things that happen to us will certainly dictate how we react to it and how we overcome it. We must look at the people who anger us and understand that they are human and that it may be their only way to feel alive or whole. We must not perceive everything people do as a personal affront to us but rather their illness manifesting in our life. Don Miguel Ruiz who is a spiritual healer and life coach would suggest that we "never take things personally". Although it is difficult to do this all the time, it is in our highest good to follow this advise. Don't take anything personally because if you do you will be angry all the time.
3. Push the Past:
Stop living in the past. Living in the past and thinking about those bad situations will only make you upset and hence you will stay angry. Push the past out and do everything you can not to bring the past up or discuss it with others or with yourself. Get yourself together, brush yourself off and live in the moment. There is nothing you can do about your past and the only thing you can change if anything is the future. By focusing on the now you automatically let go of the past.
4. Breath in Your Butterfly:
Like a butterfly we too can transform and when we focus on transforming we are becoming a butterfly. A butterfly is likely one of the most beautiful of creations and so are you. In addition to seeing your inner butterfly there are things you can do to calm yourself down using breathing techniques. Take a deep breath in through your mouth (counting to ten), hold it (count to four), exhale slowly and completely (until you feel it in your abdomen). The issue with many of us is that when we become upset our breathing becomes short and often times we can end up hyper ventilating. Learning various breathing exercises will help us to breath through the anger and it the same time picture our transformation, into a beautiful butterfly.
Here are the best four suggestions to put anger out much like how a fire is put out. Getting anger out is as urgent as putting out a fire and we must understand that holding it in is extremely toxic. We cannot expect to stay angry and that the person we are angry at will die from that poisoners thought. In fact we are the ones who will die from the poison and for holding on to that kind of toxic energy. Find out what it is that is making you angry and forgive that person, that situation or that past circumstance. Live your life doing things that feed peace and bring forward what you really want in your life. "May the Force Be With You".
Love and Light, Elliott Maximo Collazo
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