Life is a Rehearsal
There are a number of ways one can look at life. For some life is a rehearsal and there is some truth to that. In life sometimes we have to try the same thing over and over until we get it right. In this manner life is like a rehearsal indeed. We are often times made to feel poorly because we could not do something after one attempt. In schools this is often times the message we get when we get the wrong answer and someone else gets the right one, yet the truth is that it is unrealistic to expect any person to get it right immediately. It makes sense that we need to practice and that practicing is what makes us skilled at something. Life really is a rehearsal.
I am likely not alone in feeling the pressure of getting it right the first time. Early in my life I became a perfectionist because I just wanted to do it right the first time and it I didn't I would strive to do it much better. I wish I could say that my motivation was positive and that praise and recognition helped me to perfect this or that. The truth is that this would be a lie. I became a perfectionist who wanted to do things better than any other person because I was shamed into it. If for any reason I was unable to get it right the first time, I would conceal my mistake or simply deny it. Shame based learning only serves to cause more stress and cause more mistakes. I feel as though many of us, including me know what that looks like.
For many years I studied a friend who simply could not accept being wrong. In fact any disagreement related to anything he did or was perceived as wrong or unkind would elicit an almost immediate rejection. I soon uncovered that he was a person who was raised by a dotting mother who made it clear to him that he could do no wrong. In fact when he failed an exam she stated that there must have been something wrong with the test, rather than to understand that all tests are devised for some people to fail it. Her son was simply too smart to have failed it. His life like every one else's life is simply a rehearsal but in his case he does not understand or accept that. For some life is about appearing smart and perfect. Yet for this person life is really about denying his own humanness.
Life is a rehearsal whether we want to admit this or not. There will be many times and situations in life where there will need to be practice and when we will need to simply experiences a situation more than one time, perhaps many times. If we practice something enough we will inevitably get it right or we will give up on it and move on. What is most important about doing things over and over is not to get stuck and do it the same way every time expecting to learn it better the next time. We must be open to practice but we must also be open to innovation. Life is a rehearsal and we are the stars of our own life. The more we are willing to learn and become real about our lessons the more completely we will live our life.
Elliott Maximo Collazo
I am likely not alone in feeling the pressure of getting it right the first time. Early in my life I became a perfectionist because I just wanted to do it right the first time and it I didn't I would strive to do it much better. I wish I could say that my motivation was positive and that praise and recognition helped me to perfect this or that. The truth is that this would be a lie. I became a perfectionist who wanted to do things better than any other person because I was shamed into it. If for any reason I was unable to get it right the first time, I would conceal my mistake or simply deny it. Shame based learning only serves to cause more stress and cause more mistakes. I feel as though many of us, including me know what that looks like.
For many years I studied a friend who simply could not accept being wrong. In fact any disagreement related to anything he did or was perceived as wrong or unkind would elicit an almost immediate rejection. I soon uncovered that he was a person who was raised by a dotting mother who made it clear to him that he could do no wrong. In fact when he failed an exam she stated that there must have been something wrong with the test, rather than to understand that all tests are devised for some people to fail it. Her son was simply too smart to have failed it. His life like every one else's life is simply a rehearsal but in his case he does not understand or accept that. For some life is about appearing smart and perfect. Yet for this person life is really about denying his own humanness.
Life is a rehearsal whether we want to admit this or not. There will be many times and situations in life where there will need to be practice and when we will need to simply experiences a situation more than one time, perhaps many times. If we practice something enough we will inevitably get it right or we will give up on it and move on. What is most important about doing things over and over is not to get stuck and do it the same way every time expecting to learn it better the next time. We must be open to practice but we must also be open to innovation. Life is a rehearsal and we are the stars of our own life. The more we are willing to learn and become real about our lessons the more completely we will live our life.
Elliott Maximo Collazo
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