Happy Birthday to Me

This weekend my daughter Camille came to stay with me in my home for a birthday weekend.  She is such great company and I truly feel honored when she takes of her energetic and busy life to be with me.  She took me to the Patten Mansion in Geneva Illinois not far from where I live to eat.  I had a filet mignon and I received a lovely birthday slice of double chocolate cake and a happy birthday tune from her and the waitress.  The large group next to our table wished me a happy birthday as well.  It felt like I was loved once again by people who know how to love.  Being sixty one is not the easiest thing to admit but at the same time I feel very honored and proud to spend it with my daughter whom I love so much.  Just before dinner we went to a sports store I had been to before and ordered my cool orange and blue gym shoes.  One of many little birthday presents I have bought myself throughout the month.  Monday is the exact date of my birthday and I will celebrate it with a black tie party on May 23.  How I got so lucky as to have survived this tough year I don't understand.  I only know that I am really very grateful.

I remember yearning as a child to have my birthday mean something special.  I even lived with a person who called his birthday "a national holiday" but I am happy to have lived one more year after chemotherapy and radiation not to mention anxiety and depression.  Today was a day of recognition and of embracing Elliott.  Allowing myself the space to be happy in the notion that there was something important about my being on this earth and that I matter.  I am so grateful to the people I love like my daughter who have wished me well and have been a part of the celebration of life.  Today once again it was confirmed for me that there may be others who walked off but the important people are still here and they are the ones that matter.  Tomorrow is a new day and my plan is to live it with intention.  To love the fact that I am still alive and that I have much to celebrate.

Happy birthday to me.  Happy birthday to every person who lives another year.  Happy birthday to Elliott Collazo.  He means something.  His life means something.  What he does means something.  God has already verified that.  God has already affirmed my life.  I know that my life does truly have meaning and that what I am being called to do is important and means something.  Today I celebrate my life.

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