How To Never Give Up
In the SGI sector of the Buddhist practice you can visit the gift shop where they have among other artifacts and books, T-shirts that say "Never Give Up". In fact I got a red one with lack letters. I then put it on when I got home, took a selfie and sent it to my friend in California a picture of me in the shirt that she had requested of me. She is the reason I am practicing Buddhism since she invited me to attend a couple of sessions when I was visiting her. When I saw that T-shirt I thought about why I wanted it so badly and now I understand that with all that has happened in the last year the one thing I needed to recall is to not give up. There were so many times when I wanted to give up. So many times I wished I would not be on this earth due to the pain of being treated for cancer and then being left by my partner because I was angry about how he and his family treated me. But to give the latter any more lip service would be to give it power. I took my power back several months ago and today I know that just not giving up was and is enough.
Don Miguel Ruiz states in his book "The Four Agreements" to "Do Your Best" (one of the four agreements) and ever since I read that small book I understand that the only thing I can do is my best. Some days my best is not good enough for someone else but it always has to be the best for me. Like never giving up, doing my best is synonymous to not giving up. It is something that I need to recall when I think of not giving up. However much I want to give up I simply do my best at the time and for the day. That is enough for me even if it's not enough for others because if it's not I have to be OK with it.
I know what motivates me to not give up so I can share my own experience and that should also be good enough. This is my share about not giving up:
Decide that you are not going to give up. Make up your mind that you are not going to give up even at times when something is tapping on your shoulder telling you a lie about giving up and how that is inevitable. It is that intentional message you send to yourself that will make a huge difference and a big impact. Say it! I am not giving up. I am never giving up!
Stop feeling sorry for yourself or painting yourself as a victim. In order to continue forward you have to get off that story and change it to being a warrior because you are. Each of us has a warrior inside of us and each of us has made it through more than one trying experience. We all have a warrior in us.
Get the support you need. There are groups and professionals that can help you to understand that giving up is not as glamorous as it seems. Surround yourself with people who love you and will tell you how wonderful and valuable you are. Get the support you need by asking for it.
Don't talk about what you don't want. Use your voice to talk about things you do want. Focus more on what you want to happen. Don't give up. Sooner or later your mind will get the memo. Keep that focus daily and work on it daily.
Be determined. Be focused on the positive results. Keep that in the front of your mind even if you have to repeat it to yourself constantly. Ask the negative thoughts to take a hike. Literally say to those thoughts things like: "No thank you" or "Come back some other time". Talk them away.
Never giving up means that you have a little faith, just enough to wake up again the next day. Never giving up might take just a tiny bit of faith but that is all you need. Keep that faith and talk yourself into believing that you are going to be OK.
The cancer, the treatments, the abandonment and the fear truly took me for a ride. In the beginning I thought I would be consumed by it and that I would likely die either of the desease the treatments or by my own hands. I asked God to take me several times. One night in the hospital I had a horrible panic attack. I was alone in the room and I literally became frozen by fear. As the night turned to day I felt the room spinning, I felt paranoid, I felt as though I was in some cave and I was scared beyond words. I was afraid to ring the nurse bell thinking that they were going to sedate me or do something I did not want done to me. My feet were in braces to help the circulation so I felt as though I could not get out of the bed. I felt exhausted by morning so I started to fall asleep. I was then that I asked God to take me and that I wanted to die. A female voice responded and asked "Elliott, are you sure?" I said yes and suddenly felt my spirit leaving my body. With no pain at it seemed I was leaving the earth. In a moment I then changed my mind and said so. I told God that I changed my mind. She responded again with "Are your sure, it's not going to be easy".
I am alive today knowing exactly what god meant. It was and still is not easy but my will do live exceeds that wish to die. Now I won't give up! I will never give up!
Don Miguel Ruiz states in his book "The Four Agreements" to "Do Your Best" (one of the four agreements) and ever since I read that small book I understand that the only thing I can do is my best. Some days my best is not good enough for someone else but it always has to be the best for me. Like never giving up, doing my best is synonymous to not giving up. It is something that I need to recall when I think of not giving up. However much I want to give up I simply do my best at the time and for the day. That is enough for me even if it's not enough for others because if it's not I have to be OK with it.
I know what motivates me to not give up so I can share my own experience and that should also be good enough. This is my share about not giving up:
Decide that you are not going to give up. Make up your mind that you are not going to give up even at times when something is tapping on your shoulder telling you a lie about giving up and how that is inevitable. It is that intentional message you send to yourself that will make a huge difference and a big impact. Say it! I am not giving up. I am never giving up!
Stop feeling sorry for yourself or painting yourself as a victim. In order to continue forward you have to get off that story and change it to being a warrior because you are. Each of us has a warrior inside of us and each of us has made it through more than one trying experience. We all have a warrior in us.
Get the support you need. There are groups and professionals that can help you to understand that giving up is not as glamorous as it seems. Surround yourself with people who love you and will tell you how wonderful and valuable you are. Get the support you need by asking for it.
Don't talk about what you don't want. Use your voice to talk about things you do want. Focus more on what you want to happen. Don't give up. Sooner or later your mind will get the memo. Keep that focus daily and work on it daily.
Be determined. Be focused on the positive results. Keep that in the front of your mind even if you have to repeat it to yourself constantly. Ask the negative thoughts to take a hike. Literally say to those thoughts things like: "No thank you" or "Come back some other time". Talk them away.
Never giving up means that you have a little faith, just enough to wake up again the next day. Never giving up might take just a tiny bit of faith but that is all you need. Keep that faith and talk yourself into believing that you are going to be OK.
The cancer, the treatments, the abandonment and the fear truly took me for a ride. In the beginning I thought I would be consumed by it and that I would likely die either of the desease the treatments or by my own hands. I asked God to take me several times. One night in the hospital I had a horrible panic attack. I was alone in the room and I literally became frozen by fear. As the night turned to day I felt the room spinning, I felt paranoid, I felt as though I was in some cave and I was scared beyond words. I was afraid to ring the nurse bell thinking that they were going to sedate me or do something I did not want done to me. My feet were in braces to help the circulation so I felt as though I could not get out of the bed. I felt exhausted by morning so I started to fall asleep. I was then that I asked God to take me and that I wanted to die. A female voice responded and asked "Elliott, are you sure?" I said yes and suddenly felt my spirit leaving my body. With no pain at it seemed I was leaving the earth. In a moment I then changed my mind and said so. I told God that I changed my mind. She responded again with "Are your sure, it's not going to be easy".
I am alive today knowing exactly what god meant. It was and still is not easy but my will do live exceeds that wish to die. Now I won't give up! I will never give up!
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