What Are My Options?
Let me begin by saying that your options may be similar to mine. The one thing to understand is that we do have options and that even when things happen that are not pleasant our option is how we react and respond to that which is out of our control. In this blog I would like to point out some common options by sharing the positive and negative ways we digest each one.
Dreadful death or Joyful celebration of Life?:
For some people death is a dreadful experience and remains a dreadful experience. Recovery does not seem to be an option for them and they carry the darkness of a death with them for the rest of their life. On the other hand others who experience a death of a loved one soon go into celebration mode. These are the people that tell funny stories about the person they lost in body. Others like me know that death is a celebration of life and that each person who leaves this earth goes to an eternal loving place where they exist in a different form forever. Even celebrating the manner with which someone lived their life is a much more positive way to view the loss of that person. What was once a dreadful though becomes a loving and light filled thought.
Nasty Break Up or Lightly Letting Go?:
We have all seen what a nasty break up looks like. One party usually ends the relationship with a lot of shaming and blaming and the other party hates him or her for leaving them. Nasty break ups can be lethal and can end in the death of one of the people involved. It can get that bad. In cases of divorce one party may fight for the maximum amount of child support or alimony. To say it can get nasty is truly an understatement. On the other hand there are plenty of people who split up and do so by respectfully letting go with such ease that it is surprising. When we let go knowing fully that someone no longer wants us in their life we are releasing the relationship with dignity and with respect for our self and the other person. We have the option to let go in relationship with some form of kindness or we can subscribe to a nasty scene.
Self-Love or Self-Loathing?:
Although this may seem like a "no brainer" we are often faced with a decision to love our self or to be in a place of self-loathing. When we are in a place of self-loathing we punish our self and say things to our self that are negative and hurtful. We might think things like "I am a loser" or "I hate my life and the way I look today". It is easy to be in a loathing state because self-love requires work for many of us. We are not use to giving ourselves kudos and thinking loving thoughts about our self. Some of us believe that self-love is selfish. Many of us have been raised to believe that loving our self is conceited. Yet self-love is truly the path to loving others more fully, for when we loath our self we project that onto others we are trying to love.
Love or Hate?:
Some of the greatest leaders of our time like Marianne Williamson and Don Miguel Ruiz have said that hate is an illusion. My understanding of this is that love is what we naturally feel and want when we come to the world as innocent babies. We are not born with hate in our being but rather born with love in our hearts. When we are angry and we feel hatred towards others it effects us in so many ways and can even make us physically sick. Hate is a waste of our time and energy and it is a learned behavior. Love is a feeling that brings the best of who we are forward while hate sets us back and can only create darkness in our life. When we decide to live in a place of hate there are consequences that are often times very dark and difficult while living in a place of love creates light in our life. We can chose to live in a place of love or in a place of hate.
Productivity or Procrastination?:
We are human and we are not perfect so we procrastinate. We procrastinate about things we don't want to do, are avoiding or have a fear about. Practicing procrastination leads to more of the same. On the other hand being productive is living with intention and purpose. We plan some of our experiences and we do that things we need to do without avoiding them by letting go of the fear behind it. Fear of failing causes more procrastination while intention and purpose creates productivity. Every day we are faced with deciding whether we will address something of importance or avoid it. When we address what needs to be addressed we automatically live a fuller life.
Elliott Maximo Collazo
Dreadful death or Joyful celebration of Life?:
For some people death is a dreadful experience and remains a dreadful experience. Recovery does not seem to be an option for them and they carry the darkness of a death with them for the rest of their life. On the other hand others who experience a death of a loved one soon go into celebration mode. These are the people that tell funny stories about the person they lost in body. Others like me know that death is a celebration of life and that each person who leaves this earth goes to an eternal loving place where they exist in a different form forever. Even celebrating the manner with which someone lived their life is a much more positive way to view the loss of that person. What was once a dreadful though becomes a loving and light filled thought.
Nasty Break Up or Lightly Letting Go?:
We have all seen what a nasty break up looks like. One party usually ends the relationship with a lot of shaming and blaming and the other party hates him or her for leaving them. Nasty break ups can be lethal and can end in the death of one of the people involved. It can get that bad. In cases of divorce one party may fight for the maximum amount of child support or alimony. To say it can get nasty is truly an understatement. On the other hand there are plenty of people who split up and do so by respectfully letting go with such ease that it is surprising. When we let go knowing fully that someone no longer wants us in their life we are releasing the relationship with dignity and with respect for our self and the other person. We have the option to let go in relationship with some form of kindness or we can subscribe to a nasty scene.
Self-Love or Self-Loathing?:
Although this may seem like a "no brainer" we are often faced with a decision to love our self or to be in a place of self-loathing. When we are in a place of self-loathing we punish our self and say things to our self that are negative and hurtful. We might think things like "I am a loser" or "I hate my life and the way I look today". It is easy to be in a loathing state because self-love requires work for many of us. We are not use to giving ourselves kudos and thinking loving thoughts about our self. Some of us believe that self-love is selfish. Many of us have been raised to believe that loving our self is conceited. Yet self-love is truly the path to loving others more fully, for when we loath our self we project that onto others we are trying to love.
Love or Hate?:
Some of the greatest leaders of our time like Marianne Williamson and Don Miguel Ruiz have said that hate is an illusion. My understanding of this is that love is what we naturally feel and want when we come to the world as innocent babies. We are not born with hate in our being but rather born with love in our hearts. When we are angry and we feel hatred towards others it effects us in so many ways and can even make us physically sick. Hate is a waste of our time and energy and it is a learned behavior. Love is a feeling that brings the best of who we are forward while hate sets us back and can only create darkness in our life. When we decide to live in a place of hate there are consequences that are often times very dark and difficult while living in a place of love creates light in our life. We can chose to live in a place of love or in a place of hate.
Productivity or Procrastination?:
We are human and we are not perfect so we procrastinate. We procrastinate about things we don't want to do, are avoiding or have a fear about. Practicing procrastination leads to more of the same. On the other hand being productive is living with intention and purpose. We plan some of our experiences and we do that things we need to do without avoiding them by letting go of the fear behind it. Fear of failing causes more procrastination while intention and purpose creates productivity. Every day we are faced with deciding whether we will address something of importance or avoid it. When we address what needs to be addressed we automatically live a fuller life.
Elliott Maximo Collazo
Comments
Post a Comment