What You Think Of Yourself
What you think of yourself is the only opinion and perception and feeling that matters. If you feel you are a good person, a worthy soul and a wonderful human being then you must be. If you think you are a flawed and unworthy person then you will make yourself believe it and live according to that poor perception of yourself. When others hate on us and say things that are unkind or untrue about us we must be able so say: "that is what they think but it is not my reality". We must coach ourselves into understanding that it is never what others think of us that really matters and in fact what others think of us both good and not so kind don't matter, either way. Neither others positive or negative perceptions are talking to your hearts or lifting our souls permanently. Neither the view that we are beautiful or the view that we are ugly have to have any impact on us. We must know who we are and think through what we think of ourselves without regard for what any other person thinks no matter who that person is.
The best reaction or response to someone putting us down or thinking us bad is simple to say: Thanks for your opinion but m observation is that this is not my truth". I would also add: "please refrain from telling me who I am, I know better who I am than anyone else". We must stand up for who we re whether the opinion of others is extremely over the top positive or negative but especially when it is negative. Accepting a compliment and saying thank you is simple and at the same time know that when it is a compliment that feels disingenuous it is much more aligned to your true nature to say something like, thank you or thank you but I am unsure if that is me or you that you are referring to. Many times even compliments have a double meaning and are a projection. This is when you must point out and state: "that sounds like a projection". We think that the only time to respond to a compliment is to say thank you but if that response is not completely honest for you then it may be that you say thank you and add "but it sounds like a loving projection". It allows you to be honest and it is saying to the other person that you think maybe they think that positive thing about themselves, which should be acceptable.
What you think of yourself comes from where you came from and how you were raised. Many of us have been verbally abused, bullied and emotionally trashed by people we were suppose to trust like a mom or dad. As sad as it may seem all that trashing becomes our reality and when we become older we believe it to be normal. In fact we think it is so normal that we usually don't need anyone to trash us, we do it to ourselves. We say things like "you are an idiot" when we make a mistake. We yell out "you stupid ass" when we fail at something. We think so low of ourselves that we continue to bash ourselves and talk poorly to our inner spirit. We then allow others to do the same because after all we don't love ourselves and we believe them because we think the same of our inner child. What happens to us when we think low of ourselves is that we become dysfunctional because of it. We spend day after day doing nothing of importance or enjoyment because we don't like ourselves. We stay in a negative space often and although it feels bad we are more comfortable yet deep inside we know it is harmful to think this way of the person we should love the most.
When a woman is raped I can only imagine this to be a horrible experience that leaves her with distrust and a mark on her that might never fully heal. When a man is beaten by his father and threatened by death I can only imagine the anger and distrust that develops inside of him. I was an abused child and so I know from my own experience that I am still healing from it. The fact is that intentional work on myself has been the only thing to help heal me. I could not have surpassed the abuse and come up more complete because of the spiritual beliefs and the purposeful work I have done. I have been to counseling, I have prayed and meditated, I have worked out, I have cried and spoken of it and I have let it go. I have forgiven others and I have most importantly forgiven myself. The battle from what others think of you and the hurt that happens when others abuse you or put you down is a life long one. We can be assured that we will heal from abusive people and their opinions of us only if we work at being who we authentically are, are truthful and take our power back.
BE honest. What do you think of yourself? Write five things down that are negative and false and five that are positive and authentic. Make the positive and the negative aspects match like this:
I am old and not attractive (negative)
The truth is I am aging normally and am filled with wisdom to share with others.
Every negative perception should be turned into a positive one because in this way you are negativity the negative with something positive. I cal this applying love to a thought that is not accurate of you. Not matter what others think it is what you think that matters.
The best reaction or response to someone putting us down or thinking us bad is simple to say: Thanks for your opinion but m observation is that this is not my truth". I would also add: "please refrain from telling me who I am, I know better who I am than anyone else". We must stand up for who we re whether the opinion of others is extremely over the top positive or negative but especially when it is negative. Accepting a compliment and saying thank you is simple and at the same time know that when it is a compliment that feels disingenuous it is much more aligned to your true nature to say something like, thank you or thank you but I am unsure if that is me or you that you are referring to. Many times even compliments have a double meaning and are a projection. This is when you must point out and state: "that sounds like a projection". We think that the only time to respond to a compliment is to say thank you but if that response is not completely honest for you then it may be that you say thank you and add "but it sounds like a loving projection". It allows you to be honest and it is saying to the other person that you think maybe they think that positive thing about themselves, which should be acceptable.
What you think of yourself comes from where you came from and how you were raised. Many of us have been verbally abused, bullied and emotionally trashed by people we were suppose to trust like a mom or dad. As sad as it may seem all that trashing becomes our reality and when we become older we believe it to be normal. In fact we think it is so normal that we usually don't need anyone to trash us, we do it to ourselves. We say things like "you are an idiot" when we make a mistake. We yell out "you stupid ass" when we fail at something. We think so low of ourselves that we continue to bash ourselves and talk poorly to our inner spirit. We then allow others to do the same because after all we don't love ourselves and we believe them because we think the same of our inner child. What happens to us when we think low of ourselves is that we become dysfunctional because of it. We spend day after day doing nothing of importance or enjoyment because we don't like ourselves. We stay in a negative space often and although it feels bad we are more comfortable yet deep inside we know it is harmful to think this way of the person we should love the most.
When a woman is raped I can only imagine this to be a horrible experience that leaves her with distrust and a mark on her that might never fully heal. When a man is beaten by his father and threatened by death I can only imagine the anger and distrust that develops inside of him. I was an abused child and so I know from my own experience that I am still healing from it. The fact is that intentional work on myself has been the only thing to help heal me. I could not have surpassed the abuse and come up more complete because of the spiritual beliefs and the purposeful work I have done. I have been to counseling, I have prayed and meditated, I have worked out, I have cried and spoken of it and I have let it go. I have forgiven others and I have most importantly forgiven myself. The battle from what others think of you and the hurt that happens when others abuse you or put you down is a life long one. We can be assured that we will heal from abusive people and their opinions of us only if we work at being who we authentically are, are truthful and take our power back.
BE honest. What do you think of yourself? Write five things down that are negative and false and five that are positive and authentic. Make the positive and the negative aspects match like this:
I am old and not attractive (negative)
The truth is I am aging normally and am filled with wisdom to share with others.
Every negative perception should be turned into a positive one because in this way you are negativity the negative with something positive. I cal this applying love to a thought that is not accurate of you. Not matter what others think it is what you think that matters.
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