A Goat Gift
This is likely one of the most unusual things I have written about yet I admit that is it an example of how entitled we think we can be. On the show Judge Karen people sue each other for a variety of reasons. In this case a man is suing his mother-in-law for not producing the wedding gift he asked for. The mother in law is from India as well as his husband. In India giving someone a goat is called a doarry which has meaning, however in this case the husband is Anglo and was asking for a goat alleging that in this way he would not have to cut the grass in their new 6000 square foot home on a large plot of land that his rich mother gave them as a wedding gift. Apparently the mother in law thought that the request for a goat was.a joke or at best a mockery of her culture and instead of buying her new son in law a goat she donated a goat to a charity in his name. The judge assumed that this was about something much deeper but ordered the mother in law to pay the son in law 300.00 the worth of a goat. Whether she knew her son in law was was serious or not the judge ordered her to pay him for the amount. In the end it turned out that the son in law really wanted her to move. Apparently he had placed her in the guest house and she brought her luggage into the main home and into the Master bedroom.
You may ask the same question I would ask which is: "What the hell would some man sue his husband's mother for 300.00 or a goat? Well the answer is easy at least for me. Like the judge I realized that this man really was trying to make a statement yet in the most silly way possible and in order to get back at a mother in law that he deemed a bother in the month she lived with him and his husband. This like many marital disputes is really about something much more important than a goat because the man is rich and can easily afford a goat. When they exited the court he had managed to alienate his husband as well as his mother in law. He made this statement: I want you to leave our home". Of course this did not sit well with his husband, her son who was apparently a bit of a "momma's boy" as we call it. In the end the rich man likely ended up by himself because it appeared that his husband was not in agreement. As it turned out the person who had the most reason to be upset was him and it seemed likely he would be leaving with his mother to India.
Often times we confuse the real issue. We don't really want a goat because someone promised it to us but rather we are angry or upset about something totally unrelated. To think that someone would force anyone to give them or pay for a goat is almost laughable if it were not so silly. In the end we must understand that what appears to be the real issue is not and that there is something we must look deeper into in order to determine what it is that will help us to resolve an issue or heal inside. When we are dealing with family or members who are our extended family we must play fair and be in our heart place if at all possible. From the beginning this man should have spoken to his husband about why he was upset instead of taking his mother to court. Not only did he look silly, he jeopardized his relaitonship and likely put an end to it. When we are in the throws of our anger we need to stop and look inside before we get caught up in irrelevant things and incredibly silly actions. By checking in and being honest we can reslove an issue without making it larger and in fact more ridiculous than it should be.
You may ask the same question I would ask which is: "What the hell would some man sue his husband's mother for 300.00 or a goat? Well the answer is easy at least for me. Like the judge I realized that this man really was trying to make a statement yet in the most silly way possible and in order to get back at a mother in law that he deemed a bother in the month she lived with him and his husband. This like many marital disputes is really about something much more important than a goat because the man is rich and can easily afford a goat. When they exited the court he had managed to alienate his husband as well as his mother in law. He made this statement: I want you to leave our home". Of course this did not sit well with his husband, her son who was apparently a bit of a "momma's boy" as we call it. In the end the rich man likely ended up by himself because it appeared that his husband was not in agreement. As it turned out the person who had the most reason to be upset was him and it seemed likely he would be leaving with his mother to India.
Often times we confuse the real issue. We don't really want a goat because someone promised it to us but rather we are angry or upset about something totally unrelated. To think that someone would force anyone to give them or pay for a goat is almost laughable if it were not so silly. In the end we must understand that what appears to be the real issue is not and that there is something we must look deeper into in order to determine what it is that will help us to resolve an issue or heal inside. When we are dealing with family or members who are our extended family we must play fair and be in our heart place if at all possible. From the beginning this man should have spoken to his husband about why he was upset instead of taking his mother to court. Not only did he look silly, he jeopardized his relaitonship and likely put an end to it. When we are in the throws of our anger we need to stop and look inside before we get caught up in irrelevant things and incredibly silly actions. By checking in and being honest we can reslove an issue without making it larger and in fact more ridiculous than it should be.
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