Life is Sometimes about Surviving
Today I had lunch with a good friend whose mom is terminally ill. She shared some of the joy and also some of the pain around caring for her mother. Mostly she was grateful, however she admitted she was exhausted. Apparently her mom slept all day and then stayed awake a large portion of the late night hours. By then she was so tired that she wanted to get in bed but felt like she could not do that because she needed to be awake and available to her mom during the night in case she needed her. In only a few weeks I could see she was worn out in part, even though she found pleasure in serving her mother who she loves and has a close relationship with. In my search for a response to her sharing with me I simply said to her; "Sometimes all one can hope for or do is to survive". This seemed to be something she could digest in the moment and we were able to have a good laugh later in the evening.
Sometimes all we can do and hope for is to survive an experience or situation we find ourselves in. We cannot solve it because it is not something we have the power to fix but we can accept it and allow ourselves the space to admit that we are barely getting through it and that we will survive this moment, this day or this situation that is difficult. Admitting that we don't have the power to make things any different for someone we love is key to our own sanity and peace of mind. Sometimes there is truly nothing we can do to change someone's life or someone's dark experience. That is when we must go into our acceptance and embrace the fact that we are in a place where we must just let go. To survive is to make the best of circumstances we know are the truth by not denying it and by taking the most clear route back to our heart place.
Accepting that someone we love is terminally ill or that someone we love is gravely disabled can feel impossible. The truth is that nothing is impossible to us when we nurture our spirit and we are in the light of truth. Nothing heals us more than to "tell the truth" and not try to force or change something we know we cannot change. By relinquishing our false sense of power we are saying that we trust
Source and that we can be present without becoming victims and without viewing the people we love as invalids or the victim of an illness, someone who cannot do anything. If we accept what is then we can be of service to them by just loving them the best we know how. We do not have to figure it all out as this is not up to us. We can only do our best to be of loving service to someone we love.
What in your life feels like a terminal illness? What or who in your life is ill and in need of compassion? Are you present and in the moment with the person you love who is experiencing pain or is suffering from an illness? We must know that being present is the best thing we can do for others while at the same time taking time to rejuvenate and get some of our own energy back by doing things that are self-nurturing at the same time that we are serving someone we love. It is beautiful to care and to help our loved ones in a time of need but we must take some time off to retrieve our life and get what we need to go on. Life is circular and there are things we will always need to do and come back to like taking the time to be quiet and still and resting sufficiently every day. We cannot care for others if we are worn out. We cannot care for others when we feel so exhausted from lack of rest or hungry because we've not eaten properly. Life is sometimes about surviving the very things that equates as life. The ups and the downs, the light and the darkness. When we are serving others it will be how we balance the things we do for them and the things we continue to do for ourselves.
If you are struggling with a loved one because they are ill be sure to care of yourself as well if not better than you care for them. Ask for the assistance you need from others in your life and their life and do not be afraid to be honest and tell others you need their participation. Loving someone who is battling with illness and limitations can be a healing process for you and for them. It can be a life learning lesson for you and for them. Take the time to listen closely to what your inner source is staying.
Elliott Maximo Collazo
Sometimes all we can do and hope for is to survive an experience or situation we find ourselves in. We cannot solve it because it is not something we have the power to fix but we can accept it and allow ourselves the space to admit that we are barely getting through it and that we will survive this moment, this day or this situation that is difficult. Admitting that we don't have the power to make things any different for someone we love is key to our own sanity and peace of mind. Sometimes there is truly nothing we can do to change someone's life or someone's dark experience. That is when we must go into our acceptance and embrace the fact that we are in a place where we must just let go. To survive is to make the best of circumstances we know are the truth by not denying it and by taking the most clear route back to our heart place.
Accepting that someone we love is terminally ill or that someone we love is gravely disabled can feel impossible. The truth is that nothing is impossible to us when we nurture our spirit and we are in the light of truth. Nothing heals us more than to "tell the truth" and not try to force or change something we know we cannot change. By relinquishing our false sense of power we are saying that we trust
Source and that we can be present without becoming victims and without viewing the people we love as invalids or the victim of an illness, someone who cannot do anything. If we accept what is then we can be of service to them by just loving them the best we know how. We do not have to figure it all out as this is not up to us. We can only do our best to be of loving service to someone we love.
What in your life feels like a terminal illness? What or who in your life is ill and in need of compassion? Are you present and in the moment with the person you love who is experiencing pain or is suffering from an illness? We must know that being present is the best thing we can do for others while at the same time taking time to rejuvenate and get some of our own energy back by doing things that are self-nurturing at the same time that we are serving someone we love. It is beautiful to care and to help our loved ones in a time of need but we must take some time off to retrieve our life and get what we need to go on. Life is circular and there are things we will always need to do and come back to like taking the time to be quiet and still and resting sufficiently every day. We cannot care for others if we are worn out. We cannot care for others when we feel so exhausted from lack of rest or hungry because we've not eaten properly. Life is sometimes about surviving the very things that equates as life. The ups and the downs, the light and the darkness. When we are serving others it will be how we balance the things we do for them and the things we continue to do for ourselves.
If you are struggling with a loved one because they are ill be sure to care of yourself as well if not better than you care for them. Ask for the assistance you need from others in your life and their life and do not be afraid to be honest and tell others you need their participation. Loving someone who is battling with illness and limitations can be a healing process for you and for them. It can be a life learning lesson for you and for them. Take the time to listen closely to what your inner source is staying.
Elliott Maximo Collazo
Comments
Post a Comment