Luz Maria (our story)
There are many memories of my life with Luz Maria from the age of 19 to the age of 30 yet what stands out the most for me were the fun times. I enjoyed these ten years of my life more than any other stage of my life. I also feel as though I was more alive, more joyous and more in my spirit. I was allowed to be Elliott and to have my feelings and for me this was the most positive aspect of my relationship with a woman who I not only loved I respected with all my being. This blog is about her and our life as a couple and as good friends.
I met Luz when we were both 14 years old at a party in her parent's home. I was there because my uncle and cousins were friends of her family and took me to this party. The very first time I looked at her I said to myself "I want to marry that girl" and as it turned out five years later we were married. After meeting her I could not get her out of my mind. I admit that in part it had to do with her beauty but I know now that it was the beauty on the inside that truly lured me.
We spent almost five years partying almost every weekend. I loved to dance salsa and Luz learned to dance well with me. Her heart was open to what made me happy and she knew dancing was one of the ways she could honor me. I would add that her being Latina made a difference and that as Latinos we were both raised to love, honor and serve each other. It was what we knew and it worked for us. When the weekend approached I was almost always yearning to dance. Luz would have pause at times and on rare occasions say that she was not in the mood to go out. On those days we found other things to do like inviting a couple over for dinner or having an impromptu party. Every weekend was a treat and we found things to do that were fun. It was as if we never tired of each other.
About four and a half years later Luz and I became pregnant with our first child, Taina. We named her after the native indians of Puerto Rico, the Taino Indians. When Luz went into labor we rushed to the hospital and shortly after this she experienced fetal distress, requiring us to make a fast decision to do a C-section birth. Taina was born healthy but she was placed in an incubator for a day. I will never forget that day when I entered the nursery room and set eyes on what I thought was the most beautiful human being I'd ever seen. This was a pivotal moment in our lives and for us it was a joyous time. Even with that said, I remember taking our daughter home and getting up in the middle of the night to look at her sleeping and wept. I think that all of the love and the fears came up for me. Would I be a good father?
There are so many stories about my wonderful friend and the mother of my children but for me the most precious is the fact that we for all intent and purposes grew up together, evolving from the ages of 19-30, a crucial period in anyones life. During that time I learned to become a man and to understand my pain. During this time I was nurtured and loved by a person who was completely present for me, someone who did not ever withhold love from me, ever. We laughed and we cried and we became a better version of who we were. Even though we divorced we continued to be friends and her family remained respectful and even caring towards me. Luz shared her family with me and made sure that our children honored me as a father no matter what even though she had no obligation to do so. What I grew to understand was that my connection to Luz was forever and that I wanted it to be. Having been married to someone like her was certainly the best thing that happened to me.
Every day without my Lucy is an accomplishment because the pain is slowly replaced by the fond memories. Every day that the reality that I won't see her for now I become more accepting and more at peace. I know that I will see my angel in heaven and this is what I look forward to. If the last thing that happened to me as I left this earth was for her to reach her hand out to take me with her I would be elated. I know that she is looking down on me as I speak and I can feel her presence.
I love you Luz Maria Luna-Collazo. I will always love you.
I met Luz when we were both 14 years old at a party in her parent's home. I was there because my uncle and cousins were friends of her family and took me to this party. The very first time I looked at her I said to myself "I want to marry that girl" and as it turned out five years later we were married. After meeting her I could not get her out of my mind. I admit that in part it had to do with her beauty but I know now that it was the beauty on the inside that truly lured me.
We spent almost five years partying almost every weekend. I loved to dance salsa and Luz learned to dance well with me. Her heart was open to what made me happy and she knew dancing was one of the ways she could honor me. I would add that her being Latina made a difference and that as Latinos we were both raised to love, honor and serve each other. It was what we knew and it worked for us. When the weekend approached I was almost always yearning to dance. Luz would have pause at times and on rare occasions say that she was not in the mood to go out. On those days we found other things to do like inviting a couple over for dinner or having an impromptu party. Every weekend was a treat and we found things to do that were fun. It was as if we never tired of each other.
About four and a half years later Luz and I became pregnant with our first child, Taina. We named her after the native indians of Puerto Rico, the Taino Indians. When Luz went into labor we rushed to the hospital and shortly after this she experienced fetal distress, requiring us to make a fast decision to do a C-section birth. Taina was born healthy but she was placed in an incubator for a day. I will never forget that day when I entered the nursery room and set eyes on what I thought was the most beautiful human being I'd ever seen. This was a pivotal moment in our lives and for us it was a joyous time. Even with that said, I remember taking our daughter home and getting up in the middle of the night to look at her sleeping and wept. I think that all of the love and the fears came up for me. Would I be a good father?
There are so many stories about my wonderful friend and the mother of my children but for me the most precious is the fact that we for all intent and purposes grew up together, evolving from the ages of 19-30, a crucial period in anyones life. During that time I learned to become a man and to understand my pain. During this time I was nurtured and loved by a person who was completely present for me, someone who did not ever withhold love from me, ever. We laughed and we cried and we became a better version of who we were. Even though we divorced we continued to be friends and her family remained respectful and even caring towards me. Luz shared her family with me and made sure that our children honored me as a father no matter what even though she had no obligation to do so. What I grew to understand was that my connection to Luz was forever and that I wanted it to be. Having been married to someone like her was certainly the best thing that happened to me.
Every day without my Lucy is an accomplishment because the pain is slowly replaced by the fond memories. Every day that the reality that I won't see her for now I become more accepting and more at peace. I know that I will see my angel in heaven and this is what I look forward to. If the last thing that happened to me as I left this earth was for her to reach her hand out to take me with her I would be elated. I know that she is looking down on me as I speak and I can feel her presence.
I love you Luz Maria Luna-Collazo. I will always love you.
Comments
Post a Comment