A House is NOT a Home
Tomoorrow I am expecting a friend who is staying overnight and as is usual for me I am checking every aspect of my home to make sure it is visitor ready and that it honors me and honors her as well. Some in the past use to think me overboard when preparing for guests but I am of the strong opinion that one puts their best foot forward for company and that is never going to change as long as I am able to make the environment beautiful and clean for them and for me. It is nothing new for me as I have been taught that when you have company you prepare for them and use your best china and bring forth your best self. For me there is no option but to be the best one can be and pull out all the nice things for the people you love and care for.
In the past I was shamed for this. The connotation was that I was trying to impress and trying to hard at that. What I did was too "over the top" and I put out "too many candles" or too many lovely things on the table. I never bought into that notion that I was overdoing it or doing it for the sake of showing off. In fact now I feel like even if I was showing my home off that this is perfectly acceptable. Why not share the beautful crystal glasses with others who come over to your home? When would you use them otherwise? Just during the holidays? How silly that seemed and still seems to me. People don't take pride in what they work hard for or more importantly in their home which is their largest investment. Why would one not want to pull out the pretty ornaments and the linen napkins? What's wrong with that I ask? Of course the same people who critiized me served a meal on good china and then used paper napkins. I could have taken issue with that right? I could have been as shaming as they were to me but who cares. The important thing is how one feels about your home and how each of us honor it. There is no shame in paper napkins and there is nothing wrong with using linen ones and ironing them.
For my lovely friend of years I will wash the sheets and covers, freshen up the pillows and make the bed pefectly pretty. I will check every bathroom to make sure they are clean and ready to use. I will even tie a riboon on the towels for her. I will make her feel as special as she has always made me feel when she sees me wherever we happen to meet. Every detail is looked at, not to perfection but close to it I admit. I always joke with others about being one pill away from being diagnosed OCD. I don't mind joking about it now because now at sixty years young I feel proud of the way I keep my home. There is no shame in it. In fact for me there is more likely some shame around keeping a home poorly and not honoring that huge gift and investment. There is more shame in those who don't see the value of a home but rather just see it as a house made of wood, steel and bricks. I don't understand that kind of thinking but I honor it for those who would rather see their home as a place just to sleep and don't use the fine china for themselves like I do. Or the ones who don't use the little french vintage plate for their cookies and tea like I did today.
We all perceive our homes as we perceive them. We treat them like we treat ourselves I think. I believe a house is a home when you put some love and work into the care of it but some who feel more priviledged don't see the value of a home or a dollar that buys not only their plate but a plate for someone else. Those who are raised with little dust bunnies around them and who hide their head when the work needs to be done. I say love your house into being a home. Love the house so much that it becomes more than a house but rather a loving, clean, beautiful and comfotable home. See your home as part of your temple. See it as an extension of your body. See how wonderful life can be when you respect what you have and believe it to be of value. Nurture your home and share it with others who will note how much love you placed into it. For it is not the beautiful parts of my home that I value but rather all the components of a real home, not just parts that make a house.
elliott collazo gonzales
Dedicated to the haters and the slackers who don't love their home and hearth. May they see the light and how their house can be a lovely home as well.
In the past I was shamed for this. The connotation was that I was trying to impress and trying to hard at that. What I did was too "over the top" and I put out "too many candles" or too many lovely things on the table. I never bought into that notion that I was overdoing it or doing it for the sake of showing off. In fact now I feel like even if I was showing my home off that this is perfectly acceptable. Why not share the beautful crystal glasses with others who come over to your home? When would you use them otherwise? Just during the holidays? How silly that seemed and still seems to me. People don't take pride in what they work hard for or more importantly in their home which is their largest investment. Why would one not want to pull out the pretty ornaments and the linen napkins? What's wrong with that I ask? Of course the same people who critiized me served a meal on good china and then used paper napkins. I could have taken issue with that right? I could have been as shaming as they were to me but who cares. The important thing is how one feels about your home and how each of us honor it. There is no shame in paper napkins and there is nothing wrong with using linen ones and ironing them.
For my lovely friend of years I will wash the sheets and covers, freshen up the pillows and make the bed pefectly pretty. I will check every bathroom to make sure they are clean and ready to use. I will even tie a riboon on the towels for her. I will make her feel as special as she has always made me feel when she sees me wherever we happen to meet. Every detail is looked at, not to perfection but close to it I admit. I always joke with others about being one pill away from being diagnosed OCD. I don't mind joking about it now because now at sixty years young I feel proud of the way I keep my home. There is no shame in it. In fact for me there is more likely some shame around keeping a home poorly and not honoring that huge gift and investment. There is more shame in those who don't see the value of a home but rather just see it as a house made of wood, steel and bricks. I don't understand that kind of thinking but I honor it for those who would rather see their home as a place just to sleep and don't use the fine china for themselves like I do. Or the ones who don't use the little french vintage plate for their cookies and tea like I did today.
We all perceive our homes as we perceive them. We treat them like we treat ourselves I think. I believe a house is a home when you put some love and work into the care of it but some who feel more priviledged don't see the value of a home or a dollar that buys not only their plate but a plate for someone else. Those who are raised with little dust bunnies around them and who hide their head when the work needs to be done. I say love your house into being a home. Love the house so much that it becomes more than a house but rather a loving, clean, beautiful and comfotable home. See your home as part of your temple. See it as an extension of your body. See how wonderful life can be when you respect what you have and believe it to be of value. Nurture your home and share it with others who will note how much love you placed into it. For it is not the beautiful parts of my home that I value but rather all the components of a real home, not just parts that make a house.
elliott collazo gonzales
Dedicated to the haters and the slackers who don't love their home and hearth. May they see the light and how their house can be a lovely home as well.
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