Today Just One Day
Today is just one day in the life of Elliott and I want to announce that so far it is going quite well. When I accept the fact that I just have this day and this day alone, I flow and I flow like water. It is definately the way that I perceive it rather than how it perceives me. I get to chose not the day chose me. I get to say not to be told how I am going to feel. The subconcious mind will tell us what to do and that message is usually erroneous and so so wrong for us. Today I get to chose and I have chosen to love and to live in love. I chose love. I chose to let it flow no matter what asshole person says what or who does what or what my ego is picking at my brain saying like: "you are going to lose or you are going to miss it all or you are a loser or you are not worth it or he's better than you or God does not love you". All those messages are a freakiing lie and I know it so today I live in the truth and not in the perception of the truth. I live now in the very center of the truth. Not what others think is my truth like it was before today and before that day. You know what I mean?
We all get to select this day and decide what to do with it. I decided to come and see my doctor for a second opinion about my health. I chose to take care of Elliott and ensure that he was OK first and foremost. Then the second best thing is that I cross the street to get a cupcake and coffee at Molly's cupcakes: peanut butter and chocolate. I decided that I would have that treat and my little boy isnide danced for it. Not only did I dance for it, I saluted every person in my path up to the counter where I got my precious treat of all treats. Today I just live it one day at a time feeling OK with my walking cane to assist me along the way. I don't think about him and I don't think about his people or think about her and her chatter and her narcasistic babble. I think only of this day and Elliott. I don't spend my time worrying about any of the people who don't worry about me.
I could cross the street and get hit by a car but then again so could you. It is not a nice thought but it's the truth. We are here on this borrowed time and we are all unsure as to how long we will be here. I hope for the sake of my perceived enemies that none of them get hit by a bus because unlike me they are not ready. Can I just say that? I kill myself! No they are surely just not as ready as I am to let go and let God. They will be pissed and I will be serenely dead. As they say in the wizard of Oz "completely dead". Laughing and singing the whole time on the way there because unlike some I have fought in the fucking war and I am ready any time any day. Then of course they will see me around for some time or as long as god has determined them to see me. For as long as god says yes to me and my life and laughter. There seems to be more jokes left over inside of me.
We all get to select this day and decide what to do with it. I decided to come and see my doctor for a second opinion about my health. I chose to take care of Elliott and ensure that he was OK first and foremost. Then the second best thing is that I cross the street to get a cupcake and coffee at Molly's cupcakes: peanut butter and chocolate. I decided that I would have that treat and my little boy isnide danced for it. Not only did I dance for it, I saluted every person in my path up to the counter where I got my precious treat of all treats. Today I just live it one day at a time feeling OK with my walking cane to assist me along the way. I don't think about him and I don't think about his people or think about her and her chatter and her narcasistic babble. I think only of this day and Elliott. I don't spend my time worrying about any of the people who don't worry about me.
I could cross the street and get hit by a car but then again so could you. It is not a nice thought but it's the truth. We are here on this borrowed time and we are all unsure as to how long we will be here. I hope for the sake of my perceived enemies that none of them get hit by a bus because unlike me they are not ready. Can I just say that? I kill myself! No they are surely just not as ready as I am to let go and let God. They will be pissed and I will be serenely dead. As they say in the wizard of Oz "completely dead". Laughing and singing the whole time on the way there because unlike some I have fought in the fucking war and I am ready any time any day. Then of course they will see me around for some time or as long as god has determined them to see me. For as long as god says yes to me and my life and laughter. There seems to be more jokes left over inside of me.
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