A Real Family
Yesterday was quite the Thanksgiving day for me and for my family. Everyone in the family brought a dish and our family rented a space to accomodate all the family members. There was not only turkey there was a huge amoung of other foods like: potato salad, salad, mashed potatoes, rice, sweet potatoes, cranberry slices and all types of pies for dessert. There was a richness of food beyond belief but more than anything there was a richeness of love. Some of the guests were from New York and others from Florida. There must have been at least 50 family members and one friend "who had no where to go". In our family no one gets turned down.
For me the most interesting thing about this party is that the persons having the party are my x-wife's brother and his wife. For them to include me is truly a blessing to me and for many I have shared this with, highly unusual. My x-wife is my friend to this day and w have been divorced for about 30 years. It is amazing to me that she has been so kind to me and always included me in all of her family events. At one point when they were taking group pictures they called up the Collazo family and in that picture my daughters, my x-wife, my grandchildren and my former wife all posed for a family portrait. We still love each other enough to consider each other a family that includes a mother who kept my last name. A woman who have been extremely compassionate towards me during a time when I needed a person like a spouse when my own spouse checked out emotionally and then physically. Still I thank god every day for the love of two daughters and a former spouse who cares deeply for me and is a good friend.
My Thanksgiving was a test for me in some ways. A test to determine who is for me and who is there in my life who love and appreciate me. Who are the real people in my life who have always been there and who will see me through thick or thin. Those folks who are genuine and care for me, those willing to do anything for me to make me feel loved. My Thanksgiving yesterday as I looked around was filled with the same people who where there before I was married and are still there now that I am gettind divorced. They are the same people who embraced my partners and people I selected never questioning and always acccpeting them. They are the ones that are still here with me.
There are times when I am lonely and think there is no one here for me and then I attend a family event where these young men are kissing my cheek and still calling me Uncle Elliott, never severing the connection between us because the woman I was married to continued to tell them to love me and consider me family forever. The day that my former father in law passed it was as if my best friend had left me. I sobbed and yesterday I thought about how much love he demonstrated to me all the way to the end of his life on this earth. That is Thanksgiving from a family who is genuine and more connected than any other I have ever experienced or been a part of.
So if you are one of those in the group of people who is struggling for others to love you like family stop doing that number on yourself. Focus on the people who know how to love without conditions and who are confident in their love. Pick the people in your life who show you that real love even if you are married to someone whose family is not capable of loving you. Happy Thanksgiving and Happy Day.
Elliott Collazo Gonzalez
For me the most interesting thing about this party is that the persons having the party are my x-wife's brother and his wife. For them to include me is truly a blessing to me and for many I have shared this with, highly unusual. My x-wife is my friend to this day and w have been divorced for about 30 years. It is amazing to me that she has been so kind to me and always included me in all of her family events. At one point when they were taking group pictures they called up the Collazo family and in that picture my daughters, my x-wife, my grandchildren and my former wife all posed for a family portrait. We still love each other enough to consider each other a family that includes a mother who kept my last name. A woman who have been extremely compassionate towards me during a time when I needed a person like a spouse when my own spouse checked out emotionally and then physically. Still I thank god every day for the love of two daughters and a former spouse who cares deeply for me and is a good friend.
My Thanksgiving was a test for me in some ways. A test to determine who is for me and who is there in my life who love and appreciate me. Who are the real people in my life who have always been there and who will see me through thick or thin. Those folks who are genuine and care for me, those willing to do anything for me to make me feel loved. My Thanksgiving yesterday as I looked around was filled with the same people who where there before I was married and are still there now that I am gettind divorced. They are the same people who embraced my partners and people I selected never questioning and always acccpeting them. They are the ones that are still here with me.
There are times when I am lonely and think there is no one here for me and then I attend a family event where these young men are kissing my cheek and still calling me Uncle Elliott, never severing the connection between us because the woman I was married to continued to tell them to love me and consider me family forever. The day that my former father in law passed it was as if my best friend had left me. I sobbed and yesterday I thought about how much love he demonstrated to me all the way to the end of his life on this earth. That is Thanksgiving from a family who is genuine and more connected than any other I have ever experienced or been a part of.
So if you are one of those in the group of people who is struggling for others to love you like family stop doing that number on yourself. Focus on the people who know how to love without conditions and who are confident in their love. Pick the people in your life who show you that real love even if you are married to someone whose family is not capable of loving you. Happy Thanksgiving and Happy Day.
Elliott Collazo Gonzalez
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