Where You Got Your Beliefs
As I continue to read and ponder what I am consuming from Miracle Prayer I learn more each time. This time I affirmed what I have known for many years and some of those experiences we have all tried so hard to shake off. I wish that it were easier to shake off the awfully limiting beliefs that we learn in school, in church and from other people.
One of the beliefs that I grew up with was that the church I attended which happened to be Catholic was the only church and the only one that could provide salvation much like many others. I believed that their opinion of gay men was accurate and that if I was ever revealed as gay I would likely rot in hell and there would be a horrible emotional pain to pay. I would confess to a priest inside a booth that was dark and mysterious in hope that I would be freed of my sins and awful weird attraction to men. Religion became painful for me and so one day I came home and asked my grandmother if I had to attend to which she said, thank god, NO. That was the last time I went to a church in my childhood life. The limited beliefs that I heard in church stuck with me for a long time and as a result not only did I tell anyone I was gay I actually got married in hope of leaving it all behind me. It did not work.
One of the other beliefs that is brought out in the text is this idea that if we follow all the rules and get and education all will go well and that Cacasian men were superior intellectually. Of course we are all aware that for years in this country Africans were enslaved and the justification was that they were inferior. This mind set prevailed long after slavery was abolished and to this day there are many people who still believe that white men are superior to men of color. Being Latino and living in that kind of world and mindset was difficult. I found myself constantly trying to prove that I was as smart as my white classmates. I worked twice as hard on every project and every assignment to prove to myself that this could not be true and when I failed I attributed it to the fact that maybe this mysth was true. Maybe they were superior to me? As we know there have been numerous studies that negate this belief and there have been many studies that have placed white men at the top of the group selected for a job. On top of this being attractive factored in as well. The more attractive the man the more likely he would be to be hired over a less attractive male. All these myths and beliefs have drug some of us down and made us believe that we cannot do what we set out to do and that in fact we are flawed and therefor cannot accomplish this or that.
As a former teacher I can say that this third belief has validity. Schools teach children to be like everyone else, behave in a certain manner and they will suceed but if they go outside the box and the regulations set forth they will inevitably fail. The only way to win is to play along to get along. Children are so often not encouraged to be who they are and to color outside the lines. I remember doing things with studetns that was outside the box and being asked not to do it and stick only to the set curriculum. I was asked why I was teaching children about color blindness or women's rights. But every chance I got I taught out of the box and taught things that I thought tied into the lessons and life lessons. It was not well received at times and at other times applauded, but more often than not it was frowned upon. We are stilll running schools in a way that is so limited, even in the fact that we line up by gender still. When will we line up in mixed genders? Why can't we send the message that girls can be in the same space as boys and boys in the same space as girls? And when will we teach children about gay parent families and extended families?
All these beliefs limit us nd we carry them about all our lives if we are not at least aware of them and the ones that effect us. I want to invite all my friends out there to look at your beliefs that you were raised with that are not true or do not serve you. As you review some of them or even just one of them I want you to spell out the truth. What is the truth about you? I would have some truths like:
I am as intelligent and handsome as any other man.
False belief: I am not as smart as a Caucasian man.
I am creative and have the talent to make beautiful things.
Give this a try my beloved family and friends. LIst the myths and then list the truth starting with the words: "The truth is that....". Enjoy the journey.
One of the beliefs that I grew up with was that the church I attended which happened to be Catholic was the only church and the only one that could provide salvation much like many others. I believed that their opinion of gay men was accurate and that if I was ever revealed as gay I would likely rot in hell and there would be a horrible emotional pain to pay. I would confess to a priest inside a booth that was dark and mysterious in hope that I would be freed of my sins and awful weird attraction to men. Religion became painful for me and so one day I came home and asked my grandmother if I had to attend to which she said, thank god, NO. That was the last time I went to a church in my childhood life. The limited beliefs that I heard in church stuck with me for a long time and as a result not only did I tell anyone I was gay I actually got married in hope of leaving it all behind me. It did not work.
One of the other beliefs that is brought out in the text is this idea that if we follow all the rules and get and education all will go well and that Cacasian men were superior intellectually. Of course we are all aware that for years in this country Africans were enslaved and the justification was that they were inferior. This mind set prevailed long after slavery was abolished and to this day there are many people who still believe that white men are superior to men of color. Being Latino and living in that kind of world and mindset was difficult. I found myself constantly trying to prove that I was as smart as my white classmates. I worked twice as hard on every project and every assignment to prove to myself that this could not be true and when I failed I attributed it to the fact that maybe this mysth was true. Maybe they were superior to me? As we know there have been numerous studies that negate this belief and there have been many studies that have placed white men at the top of the group selected for a job. On top of this being attractive factored in as well. The more attractive the man the more likely he would be to be hired over a less attractive male. All these myths and beliefs have drug some of us down and made us believe that we cannot do what we set out to do and that in fact we are flawed and therefor cannot accomplish this or that.
As a former teacher I can say that this third belief has validity. Schools teach children to be like everyone else, behave in a certain manner and they will suceed but if they go outside the box and the regulations set forth they will inevitably fail. The only way to win is to play along to get along. Children are so often not encouraged to be who they are and to color outside the lines. I remember doing things with studetns that was outside the box and being asked not to do it and stick only to the set curriculum. I was asked why I was teaching children about color blindness or women's rights. But every chance I got I taught out of the box and taught things that I thought tied into the lessons and life lessons. It was not well received at times and at other times applauded, but more often than not it was frowned upon. We are stilll running schools in a way that is so limited, even in the fact that we line up by gender still. When will we line up in mixed genders? Why can't we send the message that girls can be in the same space as boys and boys in the same space as girls? And when will we teach children about gay parent families and extended families?
All these beliefs limit us nd we carry them about all our lives if we are not at least aware of them and the ones that effect us. I want to invite all my friends out there to look at your beliefs that you were raised with that are not true or do not serve you. As you review some of them or even just one of them I want you to spell out the truth. What is the truth about you? I would have some truths like:
I am as intelligent and handsome as any other man.
False belief: I am not as smart as a Caucasian man.
I am creative and have the talent to make beautiful things.
Give this a try my beloved family and friends. LIst the myths and then list the truth starting with the words: "The truth is that....". Enjoy the journey.
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