Love Your Way 11 (continued)
I don't know exactly why I am still on this subject of "love your way" but I am and it seems like I have more and more to saay about it. Love is a subject that of course most of us have experienced yet being loved our way seems still to be a mystery because there are more and more people asking why they are not being loved in a way they feel is beautiful, honorable and right for them. Many people are still on that quest and many are in relationships where they are not getting the love they want or the way they want it.
Miriam is a woman who has been married over thirty years. Her relationship with her husband is sexless and despite all the counseling and couple's therapy the relationship remains sexless. Nothing Miriam says makes a difference although her husband acknowledges the problem he has done nothing to resolve it. For years this has been a relationship riddled with the common issues like infidelity and financial issues. Miriam believes that her husband is a compulsive liar as well and has recently done some thing that lead her to suspect there is still another woman in the sidelines. Miriam feels she stays in the relationship because she and her husband are good friends and they get alonng well. Whatever the reasons she is still in the relationship it is obvious that she is not getting love her way or the way she would like to have it. There are many signs in the realtionship that there are issues that need attention but nothing seems more obvious than the work that needs to be done to make this relationship honor Miriam. Love is surely not occuring in a way that honors her.
Like Miriam there are a lot of women and men in realtionships that are not happening for them. They are in relationships that are not serving thier soul or thier spirit. In fact they are in relationships where tehy are not only not being loved thier way, they are simply not being loved, period. We settle for something much less than what should be acceptable and loving for ourselves. We settle and over time we become complacent, accepting less and less from the person who says he or she loves you. We don't get the love we want and it does not resemble what we thought about when we signed up for love. This is why it's important to know what you want out of love, asking for it and not settling for less than what you deserve.
Love your way is love on your terms but most of all it is love that looks and feels like love. It cannot be mistaken for anything else. It has to feel like love to you and it has to be a series of loving actions not just words but things that are done that show love. Love your way has all the facets of love including kindness, respect, honor, safety and cooperation. Love your way is very specific and we know all the parts of it. We can talk about what love is your way is not and maybe we should consider having that conversation next.
to be continued...
Miriam is a woman who has been married over thirty years. Her relationship with her husband is sexless and despite all the counseling and couple's therapy the relationship remains sexless. Nothing Miriam says makes a difference although her husband acknowledges the problem he has done nothing to resolve it. For years this has been a relationship riddled with the common issues like infidelity and financial issues. Miriam believes that her husband is a compulsive liar as well and has recently done some thing that lead her to suspect there is still another woman in the sidelines. Miriam feels she stays in the relationship because she and her husband are good friends and they get alonng well. Whatever the reasons she is still in the relationship it is obvious that she is not getting love her way or the way she would like to have it. There are many signs in the realtionship that there are issues that need attention but nothing seems more obvious than the work that needs to be done to make this relationship honor Miriam. Love is surely not occuring in a way that honors her.
Like Miriam there are a lot of women and men in realtionships that are not happening for them. They are in relationships that are not serving thier soul or thier spirit. In fact they are in relationships where tehy are not only not being loved thier way, they are simply not being loved, period. We settle for something much less than what should be acceptable and loving for ourselves. We settle and over time we become complacent, accepting less and less from the person who says he or she loves you. We don't get the love we want and it does not resemble what we thought about when we signed up for love. This is why it's important to know what you want out of love, asking for it and not settling for less than what you deserve.
Love your way is love on your terms but most of all it is love that looks and feels like love. It cannot be mistaken for anything else. It has to feel like love to you and it has to be a series of loving actions not just words but things that are done that show love. Love your way has all the facets of love including kindness, respect, honor, safety and cooperation. Love your way is very specific and we know all the parts of it. We can talk about what love is your way is not and maybe we should consider having that conversation next.
to be continued...
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