The Secret to Happiness
I wish I knew what I know now. I know you have all heard that before, but I really do. I wish I knew then what I know now. Like the secret to being happy, although I am not sure if there really is a secret and whether that secret is a secret at all. Each of us is seeking a happier life let's be honest about that, I am not the only one. The thing about being a life coach trained in spiritual principles is that I am always facinated by people who ask me what the secret is to being happy. A lot of people think me to be extra happy or they think I know something they don't know. The real truth is that I don't know anymore than you do about happiness personally but professionally I think I have something to say. I think I have learned it from others and from serving people in my professional life starting as a teacher in elementary school. I think the secret to happines depends on the day and time in my own life but that is a long story and this is a blog so I will cut to the chase.
These are what I think are some secrets to happiness:
Be in the Moment:
Staying in the moment is the happiest place to be in. We are happiest when we are in the moment. We allow ourselves to be ourselves and enjoy every minute and not lost in what will be or what was. Being in the moment means that you focus completely on what is going on around you at the time that it is happening, IN REAL TIME. If we are in the moment we are not fogged up with these thoughts of what needs to be done, worked on, taken care of or completed. We then have no other reason to live but to be in the here and now. We are happiest when we are here and now because it requires that we participate and stay in a place of complete conciousness. That is happiness.
Don't Take Things So Serious:
If you cannot laugh and not make everything so serious you will never really be happy or at least it is hard to be happy. Those of us who are so serious (I sometimes still am) waste a lot of time pondering and wondering and comparing. We waste a lot of time thinking really much to hard about everything. When we do we starve ourselves of the very air we need to be content. When we take things too serious we carry a heavy load around all day long and at times for weeks or years at a time. Even when something is serious if we take it too seriously we make it even more effective than what it needs to be. I use myself as an example and my diagnosis of cancer. I cannot take it completely serious and become so serious around my cancer so as to rob myself of my joy. In fact I have made a joke about my operation and that is that there are a lot of "assholes" but I am not one of them because I no longer have an asshole. I have had my rectum cut out and now carry instead a colostomy bag. My sister has a joke about my bag related to the movie "Bridesmaids" where the gal in the movie denys being who she is on an flight. She turned this into my colostomy bag being a prada bag. The line in our scene is "Oh this (referring to the colostomy bag), this is a Prada bag. In life nothing can be so sacred that we cannot at least see the light side of it. We will be a lot happier if we simply don't take things serious and we don't take ourselves so seriously.
Select What and Who To be Surrounded By
I think that one of the best ways to be happy is to pick and choose what and who your are around and surround your life with. This not only includes people but ironically your surroundings, down to the furniture in every room in your home and everything inside your car. I believe that what you surround yourself with will either bring you more happiness or feel dark and bring you down. The most important road to happiness is the people who are walking with you. The people that are on your path and the people who you share your life with is the most crucial element of happiness. I cannot express how hard it is for me and I am sure for others to be around people who are negative or people who are unhappy about their life. Especially crucial is the fact that we pick people who are happy with their life and who bring joy to the table. It does not mean one hundred percent but at least most of the time. Doing our best to be happy and be with others who are is the key to more happiness . Being inside a home that is clean and surrounded with beautiful colors and artifacts is another sure way to more happiness. I am especially attached to my environment and if it is unkept my attitude is effected by it. I am not as happy as I would like to be and it is because I am looking at a room that is disorganized or a home that is unkept. It is my truth but I also think that many people don't realize how much their surroundings effect their happiness.
These are what I think are some secrets to happiness:
Be in the Moment:
Staying in the moment is the happiest place to be in. We are happiest when we are in the moment. We allow ourselves to be ourselves and enjoy every minute and not lost in what will be or what was. Being in the moment means that you focus completely on what is going on around you at the time that it is happening, IN REAL TIME. If we are in the moment we are not fogged up with these thoughts of what needs to be done, worked on, taken care of or completed. We then have no other reason to live but to be in the here and now. We are happiest when we are here and now because it requires that we participate and stay in a place of complete conciousness. That is happiness.
Don't Take Things So Serious:
If you cannot laugh and not make everything so serious you will never really be happy or at least it is hard to be happy. Those of us who are so serious (I sometimes still am) waste a lot of time pondering and wondering and comparing. We waste a lot of time thinking really much to hard about everything. When we do we starve ourselves of the very air we need to be content. When we take things too serious we carry a heavy load around all day long and at times for weeks or years at a time. Even when something is serious if we take it too seriously we make it even more effective than what it needs to be. I use myself as an example and my diagnosis of cancer. I cannot take it completely serious and become so serious around my cancer so as to rob myself of my joy. In fact I have made a joke about my operation and that is that there are a lot of "assholes" but I am not one of them because I no longer have an asshole. I have had my rectum cut out and now carry instead a colostomy bag. My sister has a joke about my bag related to the movie "Bridesmaids" where the gal in the movie denys being who she is on an flight. She turned this into my colostomy bag being a prada bag. The line in our scene is "Oh this (referring to the colostomy bag), this is a Prada bag. In life nothing can be so sacred that we cannot at least see the light side of it. We will be a lot happier if we simply don't take things serious and we don't take ourselves so seriously.
Select What and Who To be Surrounded By
I think that one of the best ways to be happy is to pick and choose what and who your are around and surround your life with. This not only includes people but ironically your surroundings, down to the furniture in every room in your home and everything inside your car. I believe that what you surround yourself with will either bring you more happiness or feel dark and bring you down. The most important road to happiness is the people who are walking with you. The people that are on your path and the people who you share your life with is the most crucial element of happiness. I cannot express how hard it is for me and I am sure for others to be around people who are negative or people who are unhappy about their life. Especially crucial is the fact that we pick people who are happy with their life and who bring joy to the table. It does not mean one hundred percent but at least most of the time. Doing our best to be happy and be with others who are is the key to more happiness . Being inside a home that is clean and surrounded with beautiful colors and artifacts is another sure way to more happiness. I am especially attached to my environment and if it is unkept my attitude is effected by it. I am not as happy as I would like to be and it is because I am looking at a room that is disorganized or a home that is unkept. It is my truth but I also think that many people don't realize how much their surroundings effect their happiness.
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